I shrugged, looking down at our interlocked hands. “I let loose a bit.”
His lips spread into a soft smile. “Youlet loose?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Around everyone?”
“Why are you surprised?”
“You’re so reserved.”
I shook my head, grinning now. “Not anymore.”
I couldn’t wait for him to see how different I was. How more open I was to getting to know people, and just…I wanted to live in the present more. I didn’t want the past to hold me back.
“I’m tired of being scared all the time,” I admitted just then. “We’re young once, Leo.”
“I don’t want you to be scared,” he replied. “But I also want you to be safe—”
“And I was perfectly safe,” I assured him, “while also being able to have fun.”
He nodded, letting those words sink in. Picking up a strand of my hair, he twirled it around his finger. “You’re glowing.”
I smiled. “Like I said, I’m happy to be here—”
“No, not because of that, I mean…you.” He looked me in the eye with a curious look. “You’re so womanly, too, I love your body, Skye, it looks fuller than it did before.”
I pinched his forearm, teasingly. “Are you saying I got fat?”
He didn’t match my amusement. “I love your curves. I love your hips, your tits, your gorgeous long hair. You’re fucking glowing.”
I brushed a finger across his lips. “Since when do you swear so much?”
He kissed my finger. “I’m not entirely the same, either.”
I could tell.
It sort of unsettled me, those quiet eyes, the strange heaviness he carried. Like that carefree nature of his was gone.
Still keeping it light, I said, “I know. You’ve gained like forty pounds of muscle. I can feel the testosterone.”
He chuckled, his face finally breaking. “I needed to spend my energy somehow.”
“All that pent up need, you mean?”
“Imagine fucking for the first time, imagine the thrill of it, the need for it—and then imagine one day you can’t do it anymore.”
My smile faded. “Tell me you at least took care of yourself.”
His brows furrowed. “Did I jack off, you mean?”
I let out a dry laugh. “You don’t have to answer that.”
His lips bunched up. “I don’t?”
I picked at some invisible fluff on his shoulder. “No—”
“Well, I didn’t.”