I had to stop speaking. My throat was clogging up with emotion.
After a moment, Courtney asked, “You okay?”
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.
The emotions hit me like a storm, whipping up my guilt and increasing the weight of responsibility on my shoulders. I was the oldest, my mother had trusted me with my sister’s welfare, and I’d screwed everything up. All because I didn’t want to listen to her.
The tears began to fall.
I wiped them away, sure I could handle the onslaught of emotion coming my way.
But it didn’t stop. The hot tears continued to well in my eyes and streak down my face.
This is all my fault.
If I’d just stayed here, or gone to the human village, everything would be fine.
I should never have told my father who I was.
I’ve put everyone in danger. My sisters. Me. Hell, even the Fae. Even, to a degree, Tavlor. If he is caught helping me, if they find out what he has done, he will die.
Oh. My. God.
How could I be so selfish? So stupid? So....
The self-incrimination kept coming at me, until I couldn’t contain the sobs. Snot dripped down my face. My cheeks pinched. Saliva flew out of my mouth as I tried to control my crying.
Courtney came to sit next to me, tried to reassure me that everything was okay, but I didn’t believe her.
She had no idea how bad things were out there. Part of it was Mother’s fault for not telling us what we needed to know. Part of it was me, for keeping secrets from them as well.
Bella came into the room and suddenly she was there too, holding me, rocking me, wrapping a blanket around me.
Eventually, the tears slowed down, and the pain in my chest dropped to a level that I felt like I could breathe again.
“Shh... let me...” Bella said as she waved her wand, an unusual moment for my sister, and a peace fell over me like a drug.
I sighed, not fighting Bella’s magic as her intent was pure.
I leaned into Courtney and sighed, letting my eyes close.
My tears dried up and I was warm again.
I opened my eyes and smiled at my sister. “Thank you.”
Bella frowned. “What was that about?”
I swayed a little, enjoying the intoxicated feeling that came with the lifting of my pain. I sighed.
The elation of my spirit to have the pain taken away.
Bella squeezed my hand. “Ava,” she said, trying to lock eyes with me. “Come on. Share. You don’t need to keep everything inside. Look at what keeping things in has done to you already.”
Bella glanced towards Courtney, who shrugged. “I don’t know what happened. Don’t blame me. One minute I was asking what was happening with us in regards to our father, and all the magic stuff, and the next thing I know she was crying.”
I swallowed, some of the feelings coming back.
Bella looked at me again. “Summarize, quickly.”