“You’re no’ a pariah to me.”
The smallest smile pulled at the edge of her mouth, but she changed the subject. “So, your kitchen. Did you do the renovation yourself?”
“Aye. I like to build things.”
“I know.” He raised an eyebrow, and she flushed. “I saw you go into the Veterans’ League once, to do woodworking with the soldiers. Why do you do that?”
He shrugged. “I like it.”
She nodded encouragingly, brows raised, as if she knew there was more that he wasn’t saying. But he’d said enough today.
“You finished?” He nodded at her plate.
“Um, yeah.”
He grabbed it and his own and put them on the counter, then leaned over the sink and closed his eyes. Opening up to someone was fucking hard. It came in fits and starts. He’d held his darkest secret for so long that releasing it made him feel empty. It had defined him, but in the worst way.
Now, when it came time to share more, it felt like pulling the words from his heart, but they were tangled around the veins and muscle.
Gradually, he realized that the heat he felt at his back was Esha standing so close to him that he could feel the warmth of her body.
Hesitantly, Esha laid a hand on the tense muscles of Warren’s back. She’d followed him over here, unable to help herself even though she knew he sought distance from her. From sharing more.
That, she could understand. Trust and change weren’t easy. She swallowed hard, acknowledging that where she had trouble trusting, so did he. But she was so close now, desperate to know more about him. She was throwing herself into this, but couldn’t seem to help herself. “You go to the Veterans’ League as a way to atone, don’t you?”
He stiffened, but turned to look down at her. He stood so close that she could feel his heat. She had to stifle a shiver that rushed over her. When his eyes met hers, intense and hot, she felt the heat of a flush creep up her cheeks.
“Aye. And it helps me, no’ just them. I’m no’ a good man. No’ what everyone thinks I am.”
She raised a hand to his chest, laying it against his pounding heart. “Why is it such a secret? You’ve done it for years and no one knows about it.”
He shrugged, but his gaze dropped to her mouth. The hunger in his eyes sent a streak of heat straight to her pussy. Now that he’d had a taste of what ditching celibacy was like, he wanted more, it seemed.
But she’d told herself she was going to be smart about this. Not get involved, especially not after everything he’d told her. She could fall for a man like him. But falling for someone had never ended well in the past, and it wouldn’t end well this time either.
She pulled away, but was stopped short when he reached out and wrapped a strong arm around her waist.
A small gasp escaped her. “I should—”
The heat of his lips cut her off. One of his big hands cupped the back of her head, pulling her closer to him until the full length of her body pressed against his. Unable to help herself, she moaned at the hardness of him. His muscles, his hands, his cock. It was like being pressed up against warm, living steel.
His mouth was ravenous on hers, hot and skilled and desperate. She could feel the years he’d been denying himself, and against her own best instincts, wanted to be the one he chose to be with for the first time in so long.
When his big hand spread across her lower back and yanked her closer to him, all thought of objection fled. She ran her hands up the hard muscles of his chest until she could wrap her arms around his neck and sink her hands into the soft hair at his nape.
“Fuck, I want you.” The words were harsh against her lips.
Yes.
Still kissing her, he spun her around until the countertop pressed cold and hard at her back. She cried out when she felt his hands grip her ass and lift her up onto the counter. His hips pushed her legs wide until his cock was pressed hard against her sex.
Warren groaned at the feel of her heat against him. It was all he could do not to yank the clothes off her and plunge himself deep. He wanted nothing more than to feel her hot flesh close around his aching shaft, pulling him inside.
He’d start slow, thrusting gently until she was begging him to move harder, faster. Anything to make her come. Only when she begged him would he pound into her until the pleasure made her squeeze his cock and he followed her over the edge.
The fantasy only served to stoke his arousal to a fever pitch. He wrapped an arm around her back and pulled her closer until her soft curves were pressed up against him. He grinned when he felt her shiver. “You like that, do you?”
She moaned and kissed him harder. Her hands reached around his back and slid up his shirt, the heat of them a brand on his flesh. When she dragged her sweet mouth away from his lips, he reached up to pull her head back. Before he could, her lips brushed against his neck. Soft licks and sharp bites made his cock jump. He’d never survive this. Celibacy had worked so well in the past, but it was a ridiculous idea now.