“It’s okay. Lola and I had an early night after an exciting evening watching TV. So what’s on the agenda for today?”
“Back-to-back meetings, unfortunately. I actually have to go now because I have a client call in a few minutes. I miss you. I promise to call tonight.”
He’s in L.A. for work. He doesn’t have time to chitchat. I tried to convince myself of this, but Logan had always made time for me, no matter what, so I was unused to being put on the backburner. But I made my tone neutral.
“I miss you, too. Talk to you later.”
“I love you.”
The knot in my stomach loosened at his words. I had nothing to worry about. My unfounded concerns about Logan being in the same city as Kristina were making me paranoid.
“I love you, too, Logan.”
I felt better after our call, and spent a productive day working on my article, interspersed with playing with Lola. I also spoke to Emily, who sounded harried and stressed, but I knew she thrived on her work.
I ordered Chinese food for dinner and shared some beef and broccoli with Lola, which she seemed to appreciate. I settled in for another night of TV while waiting for Logan’s call.
The fact that my phone stayed silent for the rest of the night made sleeping almost impossible, so I popped a sleeping pill. I had a gut feeling that I wasn’t in danger of missing his call tonight.
Chapter Three
It was a dreary morning, which matched my mood. Despite having slept soundly with the aid of sleeping pills, I still felt like crap when I woke up. As expected, there were no missed calls from Logan. I felt like I was going to go crazy. I told myself that I couldn’t have imagined his depth of feeling for me. My God, he had waited years for me, hoping that I would finally be ready to have a relationship with him. He couldn’t have ruined it all by being with Kristina again. But I couldn’t rationalize to myself why he wouldn’t have called me again. No matter how crazy work got, he could have taken a minute to let me know he couldn’t talk. The only reason I could come up with as to why he hadn’t called me was because he didn’t want Kristina to overhear him.
I felt so confused because everything I had ever known about Logan and our relationship was at odds with his lack of contact. I was glad Emily was coming back today because I desperately needed someone to talk to. I needed her to tell me I was being ridiculous, that Logan loved me and would never betray me.
I was dragging myself to get dressed so I could take Lola out for her morning walk, when my phone rang. My heart sank when I saw it was Logan calling, because I knew he was going to give me some bullshit excuse that I would want to desperately believe but couldn’t. A part of me didn’t want to answer it, because if I didn’t hear his lies, maybe I could believe that things were still all right between us. But I knew not answering his call would just be delaying the inevitable.
“Hello,” I said, trying to sound emotionless.
“Maddie, I’m sorry I didn’t call. Don’t worry, I’m okay, but I was in a car accident last night.”
My heart squeezed tight as panic seized me. I was so, so stupid. So self-involved in my own insecurities and fears, that instead of calling him last night when I hadn’t heard from him, I had immediately assumed the worst.
“Are you okay? What happened? Are you hurt? Did you go to the hospital?” I couldn’t stop the barrage of questions spilling from my mouth. I was terrified that he was seriously hurt.
“I’m okay. No serious injuries.” Despite his words, he sounded exhausted. “A car going in the opposite direction swerved into my lane when the driver dozed off. He pushed me off the road, but fortunately, the collision wasn’t too bad. I just have a few bumps and bruises.”
I had a feeling that Logan was downplaying the whole thing. A fear I had never known before overwhelmed me as I realized that I could have lost Logan last night.
“What do you mean, a few bumps and bruises? Where are you hurt?” My voice was getting shrill but I couldn’t seem to control the panic, even though obviously Logan wasn’t seriously hurt because he was talking to me on the phone.
“I’m really okay,” Logan reassured me. “I bruised a few ribs and I have some scratches and bruises on my face and arms. I would have called you last night to let you know what happened, but I was drifting in and out.”
“You were unconscious?” I was right, this was more serious than Logan was letting on. “I’m coming to L.A. on the first flight I can get. Are you at the hotel right now?”
Logan tried to make his voice soothing, which made me feel worse because he should be the one being comforted, not me. “I’m okay, Maddie, I promise. I hit my head in the collision but I’m fine now. I’m at the hospital but I’m about to be discharged. I’m cutting my work trip short and getting a flight back home tonight.”
“Oh, my God, you spent the night at the hospital? I’m so glad you’re coming back tonight, but can’t you get on an earlier flight?” I sucked in my breath. “Wait—are you sure you’re okay to fly?”
A hundred things were going through my head, but fear and guilt dominated them all. I felt ashamed that I had doubted Logan and his faithfulness to me when he had been lying in a hospital bed, hurt and unconscious.
“I’m fine to fly, the doctor cleared me. I have to tie up some loose ends at work so I can’t get on an earlier flight. But I should be home by about ten tonight.” He paused before continuing, his voice softening. “I want you waiting for me at my apartment. I miss you so damn much.”
“I miss you, too. I’ll be there.” My voice dropped. “I’m so sorry, Logan.”
“What are you sorry for, sweetheart?” Logan sounded bemused. “It’s not your fault I got into an accident.”
“I know, I just…I’m just so glad you’re okay. I love you.”