“You don’t sound like anything but a woman trying to sort out her emotions,” I say.
“I want all of you, in my own way. You all fill a part of me that is empty when you guys aren’t around.”
“Have you talked with anyone else about this?”
“No. I’m too scared. Sebastian’s so possessive, and Theo’s so calm. I’m scared Theo will go along with it just to make me happy without any regard to what will make him happy. And I’m scared Sebastian will slaughter all of you just to prove a point.”
There’s movement underneath the door that catches my eye. Clarissa closes her eyes, and I train my ears quickly onto what’s happening beyond the door.
And I can hear the guys.
“Did she say all of us?” Sebastian asks.
“She loves all of us?” Theo asks.
“Wants. She said wants,” Sebastian says.
“I think she said wants and loves,” Vlad says.
“She didn’t mention you,” Sebastian says.
“What?” Vlad asks.
“What did she say about me?” Theo asks.
They’re listening, and it makes me wonder what they think about all of this. Part of me is angry at them for eavesdropping, but part of me is relieved. This will give them time to process everything Clarissa is struggling with before she has a chance to talk with them about it.
“What do you think?” she asks.
“About what?”
“About what I’ve said?”
“Do you want me to be personal or logical?”
“Why do I have to choose? That’s what I like about you. I never have to choose between the two.”
I smile and cup her cheek as I run my thumb over her skin.
“Logically, it’s technically what you’ve been bred for. Not that your sole purpose is to fall in love and have children, but in a way, it is ingrained into you. It only makes sense that if you are biologically programmed to mate with all Primal species that you should be able to fall in love with all of them.”
“But at once?” she asks.
“Why not? People and Primals alike love many people at the same time. Their mothers. Their fathers. Siblings. Friends. All of that is love, but it’s all different love.”
“I don’t love you guys like parents or brothers, Toshi.”
“I’m not saying you do. I’m simply challenging the box humans usually put themselves in. Love is what it is. And if you fall in love with someone, that doesn’t mean you’re incapable of not loving anyone else ever. If that were the case, parents wouldn’t be loved after their children married. If that were the case, only one parent could be loved by a child at a time. But that isn’t what happens.”
“So you don’t think I’m crazy?” she asks.
“No. I think you’re finally allowing yourself to fully explore a side of you that has always existed but has been dormant. And whatever you choose, all I hope is that you’ll keep me along for the ride.”
“You would be okay with that? With me loving someone other than you?”
“Yes. I love you, Clarissa. I want you safe. I want you happy. I want you healthy. I want you in my life, no matter the capacity. And if this is what gets me you, then I’m fine with it.”
The smile that crosses her face warms my chest.