“But you don’t have to. Clarissa. Whether a car is in a garage or sitting on a building, it’s still a car. Right?”
“What? Of course, it is,” I say.
“And if you change out the engine and add wings and change the oil and add different tires and give it a new coat of paint, it’s still a car. Right?”
“Joel, really. I get your point, but it’s not the same.”
“Clarissa, just because you had elements added to you doesn’t mean your base form changed. You’re still human. You’ve got Primal aspects, but you’re still human. Just like that car is still a car. No matter where you stick it or what you add to it, the base of it will always be a car.”
“I was altered, Joel. As a fetus in my mother’s body. My DNA changed. All of this, it’s encoded into my DNA.”
“But you don’t know that. Not for sure. And with you carrying a child, you have to be on the defensive. You don’t know if your body will protect that child the way a Primal’s body would. Staying safe during this war is the only way to keep you safe if this prophecy means so much to you.”
“You say that as if you don’t believe it.”
“I’m not sure I do. I don’t put much stock in wisdom or the mystic arts or whatever the hell Bears talk about in their groups. I put my faith in proof,” he says.
“Then take a good, hard look at me. Because I’m living proof that Project Eden works. I’m living proof that the prophecy is real. I’m carrying a child within a body that can mate with any Primal species on this planet.”
“So, what? You’re relegating yourself to be a puppy mill for the Primals? Destined to do nothing else but shove out children until it kills you?”
I growl at Joel, and he takes a step back. I don’t like him. Not one bit. I can smell his want for me. I know his words are coming from a place of pure lust and jealousy. He isn’t worth my time. He’s a pathetic little human who wants to try and convince me I’m weak and feeble so he can feel like the man he wants to prove himself to be. But this is bigger than him. It’s bigger than any of us. I’m carrying a child in my body, and I must do whatever I can to protect this baby. I have to do whatever I can to make sure this child is born into a world that will see it differently. That will treat it differently.
That will see it as an equal instead of as a threat.
“We can take care of you,” Joel says. “Josie and I. And the village. If you say behind—if you stay with us, you have a chance at something normal. You can still make an impact and save this world from the Council and live the life you want.”
“And who are you to tell me about the life I want?” I ask.
“I can see it in your eyes, Clarissa.”
“What?”
“Every time those guys start to fight and bicker, I see your eyes grow a couple shades dimmer. Every time this war is mentioned, I watch the briefest moment of panic wash behind your eyes. Every time you get sick and it reminds you of this pregnancy, I see the uncertainty wash over your face. You haven’t told them, have you?”
“I haven’t found the right time to,” I say.
“You’re already more comfortable around me if you’re willing to talk about this with me and not them.”
“The only reason I’m talking about it with you is because your sister opened her big mouth and talked to you about it. Then you confronted me with it. If Josie hadn’t told you, I never would have,” I say.
“I don’t believe that. Not for a second.”
“Then that’s fine. Looks like proof doesn’t suit you as much as you say it does.”
r /> “They’re panting dogs around you, Clarissa. Men waiting to sink themselves into you because of your supposed purpose. They don’t see you the way I see you. To them, you’re a breeding ground. A way to gain the upper hand.”
“Don’t you dare talk about my boys that way,” I growl.
“What I’m trying to say is I don’t see you that way. I don’t see you as a baby-making machine. I see you as a woman. A strong, intelligent, self-sufficient, powerful woman. And any man worthy of you should see you in the same light. Can’t you see that?”
“I see it just fine. And if your plea here is to try and cast them out so you can be with me, then save it. I’ve been dealing with their bickering and their shenanigans for months. But when I chose my mate—”
I draw in a deep breath to try and keep my tears at bay. It’s weird, but I can already feel my child rolling around in my body. Josie says that, at best, I’m only two months along. And I know regular human females don’t feel their children in their bodies until at least double that time period.
But I’m not a normal human female.
I’m honestly not a human female at all.