CHAPTER ONE
KELLY’S face paled and her breathing seemed to stop as she saw the tall arrogant man entering the hotel, the usual blonde on his arm. She would have to be blonde, Jordan had a passion for them. But at least it wasn’t Angela Divine. That didn’t surprise Kelly either; after five years there would have been a couple of dozen blondes, Angela Divine long ago replaced.
Jordan hadn’t seen her as he walked over to the reception desk, so she had ample opportunity to look at him without him being aware of it. He would be thirty-nine now, and he looked it, the grey hair at his temples lending distinction to his bearing, a startling contrast to his jet black hair. The grey hadn’t been there five years ago, and the deep lines of cynicism beside his nose and mouth had become all the more noticeable. The grey of his eyes was just as steely, his full mouth set in a firm line, the deep sensuality of his nature held firmly in check.
Kelly stepped back as Jordan and the beautiful blonde got into the lift, and she remained hidden until the lift began to ascend. It had been inevitable that this would happen, that they would meet again sometime, and yet Kelly found she still wasn’t ready for it.
Five years ago she had been eighteen, an easy victim to Jordan’s lethal charm. She had fallen in love with the leashed vitality of him on sight, and had remained in love with him until the day almost seven months later when her dreams of belonging to Jordan for ever had been destroyed, as surely as the child she had been carrying had been destroyed.
She could still vividly remember that day, could remember waking up in that cold clinical room, a sense of doom about her even though she couldn’t remember what she was doing there. She had soon found out!
‘I’m afraid the baby is gone, Mrs Lord.’
Kelly had blinked up at the young doctor, her mind in a fog. Baby? What baby, she wanted to ask. More to the point, whose baby?
‘Sleep now, Mrs Lord,’ a nurse soothed. ‘Sleep now and your husband should be back when you wake up again.’
‘Back?’ Kelly asked, her mouth very dry. ‘Back from where?’
The nurse tucked the bedclothes more firmly around her. ‘Mr Lord had to leave, to go to his office, I think.’
‘Oh yes,’ Kelly accepted bitterly. She had known it would be something to do with his office that would take Jordan away from her when she needed him. She turned away so that the nurse shouldn’t see her ready tears. ‘Thank you,’ she murmured huskily. ‘I think I should like to sleep now.’
The nurse looked concerned. ‘Would you like something to help you sleep?’
‘Why?’ Her voice was shrill as she looked up at the other girl. ‘I’m not ill, am I?’
‘No, of course not. But you must be feeling weak after the baby.’
Kelly frowned, her eyelids starting to droop sleepily without the necessity of drugs. The nurse had mentioned a baby now. She just wished she knew what they were talking about…
When she woke again the loss of her baby had shot into her like a knife, the baby she had only carried for five months, the baby who hadn’t stood a chance of survival when she had started to miscarry.
Her blue eyes were tightly shut to hold out the cold reality of daylight for as long as possible. Would Jordan have come back from his office yet, or would he still be putting that first? After all, she wasn’t ill, she had just lost the baby that had come to be the most important thing in her life, the baby Jordan had neither wanted or desired.
Her breath caught in a sob and she turned to bury her face in the pillow, crying out her misery and pain.
‘Kelly?’ A hand caressed her shoulder through the thin material of her nightgown.
She had flinched away from that hand, turning slowly to look at her husband. ‘Jordan,’ she greeted coldly, her eyes huge and bewildered in her pale face. ‘Did you finish your business?’ she asked bitterly.
Jordan frowned, a tall man, very attractive, who had stirred many a female heart before their marriage six months earlier, and still continued to do so, as she knew to her cost.
‘You were asleep,’ his voice was stilted, his manner withdrawn. ‘There was nothing I could do.’
‘Of course not,’ she replied distantly. ‘Did you deal with the matter?’ She gave a choked laugh. ‘Of course you did, what a stupid question.’
‘I haven’t been to the office, Kelly. I—’
She struggled to sit up, not wanting to listen to him. ‘Could you get someone to help me, please?’
He lent over her, his hard presence at once overwhelming her, as it usually did. ‘I’ll help you,’ he sat her forward. ‘Just hold on to me while I adjust the back-rest.’
‘No!’ She shrank away from him. ‘Get someone else to help me. Get a nurse. Get anyone but you!’ she cried hysterically.
He instantly moved away, his face a shuttered mask. ‘There’ll be other babies, Kelly,’ he said coldly. ‘I’m sorry about this one, but—’
‘No!’ she cried again. ‘There won’t be any more. I won’t have any more!’ She looked at him like a frightened child, her fingers clenching and unclenching on the coverlet. ‘No more,’ she repeated, suddenly all the life flowing out of her as she collapsed weakly back on to the pillows.
‘You’re tired,’ Jordan said abruptly. ‘Try to sleep now and I’ll come back and see you later.’
‘Going back to work, Jordan?’ she taunted. ‘Or could Angela be the main attraction?’
Those grey eyes narrowed ominously. ‘Angela? You mean my secretary?’
Kelly’s mouth turned back with a sneer. ‘If that’s what you choose to call her.’
‘You’re more tired than you realise,-’ her husband snapped. ‘You’re becoming fanciful. Sleep now and we’ll talk later.’
‘I only want to know one thing,’ she said coldly. ‘When can I get out of here?’
‘A couple of weeks, the doctor said, and even then you’ll still be very weak.’
‘I’ve always been weak where you’re concerned,’ her voice was distant, all emotion locked away, ‘but not any more.’
He frowned. ‘What are you saying now, Kelly? I realise you’re upset about the baby—’
‘What was it?’ she asked dully.
Jordan looked startled by the question. ‘Don’t dwell on it, Kelly. It’s best forgotten.’
Forgotten! She would never forget the loss of the baby, or the reason behind it. ‘What was it, Jordan?’
He gave an impatient sigh at her obstinacy. ‘A girl,’ he told her curtly.