They sat in silence as Kim packed the last of her things. Mel had felt like she was walking on eggshells all week. Was Kim upset about going home to her overbearing, conservative family? Or had Mel said or done something to set her off?
“So you’re still coming to visit over the summer, right?” Mel asked. Mel wasn’t looking forward to going ‘home.’ Kim’s visit was the only thing she had to look forward to.
“Yeah, about that…” Kim sat down on the bed a few feet away from Mel. “I don’t think we should do this anymore. We’ve let things go far enough.”
“What? What do you mean?”
“You know, this. It was fun while it lasted, but it’s run its course.”
Mel at Kim blankly.
“Come on, Mel. This was never serious. You had to know that.”
Mel’s stomach dropped. She knew where Kim was going, but she refused to believe it.
“Of course you didn’t.” Kim rolled her eyes. “You only saw what you wanted to see. Think about it.”
Was she right? Mel thought about all the times Kim had been hot and cold. How she’d pushed Mel away over and over. How she seemed to only care about sex. Had Mel had ignored all the signs because she was in love with Kim? “No.” Mel finally spoke. “No. You told me you loved me a hundred times. You can’t tell me that wasn’t real.”
“I only told you that to get you off my back. Hell, I only agreed to be your girlfriend so you’d stop bothering me about it. It was just so hard to say no to you when you were always so sad and needy all the time. I didn’t feel like I had a choice.”
“Are you saying you were with me out of pity?”
“Don’t look at me like that, Mel. Like I said, it’s college. I wanted to experiment. Everyone does this. But I’m not actually into girls. Not that way. You’ll probably grow out of it too.”
“You’re wrong, Kim. This isn’t a phase for me. I like girls. I always have. And I love you!”
“Maybe you really do love me. But I never loved you. You knew that. You even said it to me yourself.”
No. Could it be true? Had their entire relationship been a lie?
“I’m really sorry, Mel…”
Kim’s words all hit Mel at once. She started to cry. Kim was the first girl she’d ever loved. And now, like everyone else in Mel’s life, Kim was throwing her away like she meant nothing.
“I gotta go, my ride is leaving soon. I’ll see you around, okay?” Kim got up from the bed and left Mel sobbing in their empty dorm room.
Chapter Twenty-One
Mel sat next to Vanessa in the back seat of Vanessa’s Mercedes. As soon as she’d returned from her trip, Vanessa had taken Mel to dinner at one of the restaurants she owned. Now, they were on their way to Lilith’s Den, for the first time since that night so long ago.
Butterflies filled Mel?
?s stomach. She was excited. But at the same time, she felt a sense of unease. Since Mel’s conversation with Rose, the woman’s words had played over and over in her head. The time and distance from Vanessa had only made her insecurities fester.
“Are you all right, my pet?” Vanessa asked.
“I’m fine,” Mel said. The way Vanessa called her ‘my pet’ rankled her now.
Vanessa’s phone rang. Mel tensed. Was it James calling to tell Vanessa about Rose? Mel had kept her word to him and hadn’t said anything about it to Vanessa. Had James called to tell her already? Even if he had, Mel doubted that Vanessa would mention it to her.
Vanessa looked at her phone. She silenced it and shoved it back in her purse. It definitely wasn’t James. Vanessa always picked up his calls. It had to be another of those mysterious phone calls that Vanessa always ignored. It was happening a lot lately. And they seemed to get to her even more. At times Mel would find Vanessa gazing off into the distance, her forehead lined with concern. Like right now.
“Is everything okay?” Mel asked.
“Yes.” Vanessa snapped out of her trance. “Everything is fine.”
“Are you sure? You seem worried.”