“Congratulations, Tay,” he mumbled against my shoulder, and I squeezed him tighter.
“I’ve missed you, Blakey,” I confessed, and I felt him exhale, but he didn’t speak. My heart stopped dead. I needed to know if he felt the same way, so I stepped out of his hold. “Did you miss me?”
“Of course, I miss you every damn day,” he hissed, sounding wounded that I even asked the question.
“Then why haven’t you—”
“Listen, now is not the time to talk about it.” He cast several glances around us before continuing. “We will talk. Okay?”
I studied him for a minute, my gut telling me that what he wanted to say to me and what I wanted to hear would be different. I prayed that I was wrong.
We went to Annette’s Catch for the big graduation party Jonna’s parents were throwing for our small class of fifty-one students. The place was packed. Ms. Annette was running around in a happy frenzy as she brought out platters of food. Mr. Hal was behind the bar mixing cocktails for the adults, and when no one was looking, Jonna was sneaking drinks of her own.
“Jonna Lee! You better not be drinkin’,” Ms. Annette called from the kitchen. Jonna grabbed Dylan’s hand and ran outside while giggling. I shook my head and smiled. That girl was always up to something.
There was a tug on one of my curls, and I turned around to see Blake standing behind me. When I grinned at him, his lips curved, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes.
“Hey, you ready to have that talk?”
“Um, sure.” My heart started to pound rapidly, and I had a gut feeling that I knew I wasn’t going to like this talk. Blake looked around us before walking out of the front door, and I followed. Once we reached his car, we got inside. Blake cranked the engine and turned on the air conditioning. It was June in South Carolina and the weather was hot and muggy. We sat for a while, not saying a word, as the music on the radio filled the silence.
“Tayia,” Blake started to speak, and I knew the moment he chose to say my full name instead of the nickname only he used that I wanted to jump out of the car and take off running from the inevitable.
“I crossed the line with you, and I want to apologize.”
“Wha . . . what?” I blinked at him several times. “Crossed the line?”
“Yeah. What we did should have never happened, and I’m sorry for that. You’re young. I know you’ve had a crush on me, and in a moment of weakness, I took advantage of that.”
“Wait a minute. I’m confused. What part of what happened in the cabin seemed like I was being taken advantage of? I knew full well what was happening, Blake. I wanted it.” I reached out and grabbed his hand. “I still want it. I thought you did, too.” My voice trailed off with the last sentence.
“Tay.” He let out a long breath then pulled his hand away and rubbed it over his face. “I shouldn’t want it. You shouldn’t, either.”
And there it was. His regret. Right out in the open and ripping my heart in to tiny shreds. Tears began to well in my eyes and my throat grew tight as I tried to hold back the sobs threatening to release.
“Ah, shit. Don’t start crying. You know I hate it when you do that,” he said softly as he reached for me, but I scooted away from him.
“I thought . . . that you . . . that you and me would . . .” I stammered as tears started to flow. “Did it mean anything?”
“Yes. Yes, it did. But things can’t be the way we want. You know our parents will never be okay with this. Hell, everyone in town thinks we’re blood related. It was something we should have never acted on. I take full responsibility for not stopping it.”
“Right, because I’m a naïve girl incapable of knowing what I want.” I snorted while reaching for the handle. “Okay, well, it won’t happen again. I can promise you that.” When I threw the door open to step out, Blake was already pulling me back.
“Please don’t leave.”
“Screw you, Blake.” I struggled to break free of his hold.
“Tayia, stop.”
“Let me go.”
“I’m sorry. Please stay.” He wrapped his arms around me from behind, his hands applying pressure against my stomach as he held me against him.
“I should have known when you didn’t break up with Lucy. I hoped that you would . . .” My voice cracked as I worked hard to control my emotions. “I’m so stupid.”
“Don’t you see how wrong it is? Us being together?”
“I don’t care, Blake. I love you. You said that you loved me.”