I swear, this felt like a dream, like it wasn’t really happening. There wasn’t a hint of amusement in his expression. Channing was seriously propositioning me. As much as I wanted to dismiss it, to tell him he was out of his mind, another part of me became increasingly curious—aroused. But this wasn’t as simple as he was making it out to be.
“You’re suggesting I try to pretend that you’re just no one to me? How exactly could this work, Channing?”
“We would have to set ground rules. Keep our personal relationship separate from our sexual relationship.”
“And how do we do that when we live together?”
“We could meet here, say on Saturdays, and we wouldn’t discuss it the rest of the week. We wouldn’t have to discuss it at all. No one will know about this but us. And I promise never to tell Rory. I assume his ever finding out would be your biggest hesitation.”
I just kept shaking my head back and forth in an attempt to process everything. “What do you get out of this?”
“I get to be with the girl I’ve fantasized about since I was sixteen.”
Since he was sixteen?
“I never knew you felt that way.”
“I hid it very well. But I’ve always been attracted to you.”
My gut was telling me that I was crazy for considering this, but my body couldn’t be calmed. It was completely buzzing at the thought of being with him. Everything was suddenly magnified—his scent, the nearness of his perfect body. I wasn’t sure if I had the strength to say no, because there was no bigger turn on than being wanted.
My voice cracked. “I really don’t know if this is a good idea.”
“You don’t have to make a decision now. Take some time to think about it. No hard feelings if you decide against it. We’ll forget this night ever happened. I promise if you tell me no, we can pretend this conversation never took place. And as much as I hope you don’t, if you decide to contact the real Gentleman Nine, I promise not to judge you or interfere, either.”
As mad as I was at him, his showing up here was a reality check. A part of me was actually relieved to be sitting here with Channing now and not some male hooker. The longer we sat in this bar, the crazier it seemed that I had come here tonight to pay for sex. At least with Channing, I felt safe.
The idea of unbridled sex with him was extremely tempting. To know that he wanted me, too, made me feel sexier than I had in a long time.
But I still couldn’t believe this. And he certainly wasn’t going to get an answer tonight. This would change the entire dynamic of our relationship.
It would change my life.CHAPTER ELEVEN* * *CHANNINGApparently, one sure-fire way to get Amber to avoid you is to suggest a sexual relationship. Noted.
The days that followed our meetup at The Peabody Hotel were tense, although the massive relief I felt as a result of having finally told her the truth about Gentleman Nine was the consolation. That was the first and last time I would ever lie to her.
And she hadn’t kicked me out of the house or anything. So, that was a plus. Amber also hadn’t given me a solid no, either. She’d left the door open to accepting my offer. The last thing she said to me before we left the hotel was that she’d think about it. My body unfortunately chose to focus on that. Whenever we were in the same room, I could feel myself getting turned on from just thinking about the prospect of getting to have sex with her. The fact that she somehow felt it was wrong, made me want it even more. The more forbidden, the sweeter the fruit.
Wednesday night, I’d just gotten home from work when she called my cell.
“Oh, you’re home. Thank God,” she said, sounding out of breath.
“What’s going on? Is everything okay?”
She was panicked. “I need your help.”
A rush of adrenaline hit me. “Tell me what’s happening.”
“I’m around the corner with Milo. I was out with him. I’d taken him to a restaurant, and he spilled split pea soup all over his shirt. Since we were closer to my place than his, I figured I would take him back here and borrow one of your shirts. But now, he’s decided to drop to the ground. He’s lying on the sidewalk, and I can’t get him up. He’s too big for me to lift.”
Shit.
Already making my way out the door, I said, “I’ll be right there.”
“Thank you. We’re at the corner of Stockton and East Streets.”
Amber looked flustered as I approached them. She was huffing and puffing, blowing air up into her bangs, which she often did when she was stressed. Milo, on the other hand, was just sitting on the sidewalk chilling and playing with his iPad as people passed by obliviously, practically walking right over him.