They’d probably shake their heads and share a look of disappointment, but I had to hope maybe I’d also see a spark of excitement at becoming grandparents.
They were both successful doctors and had spent their lives traveling abroad while they pawned me off on nannies. The world had always been more important than their son.
Maybe if they had a grandchild, they would stay for more than one holiday a year.
Maybe if I had a wife.
The idea lit like a light bulb, flooding me until it came pouring out.
“Marry me.”
Her head jerked back like I’d slapped her. “What? No. God, no.”
I tried not to be too offended and ignore the squeezing in my chest at the disgust twisting her face. “Why?”
“Because we’ve been around each other for less than an hour and we’re already arguing.” She held up her fingers as she listed reasons off. “All we do is argue. Because I don’t know you. Because I could continue for another hour about all the reasons that’s a bad idea.”
“Then get to know me.” I offered what I thought was the easiest solution. Softening my tone, I stepped away from the desk and closer to her. “Like it or not, Carina, that’s my baby, and that means something to me. I can’t brush it off like you seem to want me to. So, we might as well try.”
The fear was winning over her stubborn pride, and I fought from pulling her to me and holding her close to comfort her. She swallowed hard, and I gave her space to think over what I said. I’d give her as long as she needed in here because no matter what, she wasn’t walking out that door without me knowing exactly how to reach her, and a plan for what was next.
“Do you have a girlfriend or…someone in your life?”
I blinked at her question, trying to keep up with the subject change. “What? No.”
“Are you lying?”
My head jerked back like she’d slapped me. “No, I’m not lying. Your faith in me is awe-inspiring.”
“I don’t know you.”
“Again…” I tried to control the irritation her doubt arose. “Then get to know me.”
She swallowed, searching my face, the moment stretching on endlessly.
“Fine. We can get to know each other.” The breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding rushed out. “For the baby,” she clarified.
She pushed past me, and snatched a pen and paper from the desk, bending over to write.
“What is it?” I asked, watching her hair fall over her shoulder, aching to run my fingers through it.
“What?”
“The baby? Do you have a name?”
She stood upright and rested her hand on her belly. I struggled not to do the same. “I don’t know yet. I wanted to be surprised at the birth.”
That didn’t sound like her at all, and I liked the little tidbit that maybe Carina wasn’t as strait-laced as she portrayed. Although, I kind of already knew that when she let me make her come in front of a photographer.
“I want it to stay that way. So, no finding out,” she rushed out. “I’ve been preparing for this, and I have a plan that works.”
“Don’t worry. I don’t plan on storming in and making demands.”
Her shoulders sagged, and it hit me that that was what she thought I’d do. Come in and take away her control of the situation.
“We need to get together and work this out.”
She nodded, and I ached with the need to touch her—to feel where my baby lay. Unable to fight it anymore, I rested my hand over her belly, letting my fingers feel the soft fabric over her hard stomach. I half expected her to pull away and was pleased when she didn’t.
“You look beautiful, Carina. Radiant.”
Again, she blushed, and I struggled not to step closer and press my lips to her cheek to feel the warmth. Instead, I settled on using my other hand to stroke her skin, just to feel if it was as soft as I remembered. The blush deepened, and when she caught my smirk, she stepped back, pressing the paper to my hand.
“Send me your number, and I’ll let you know when I’m free to meet up.”
“This week,” I inserted, demanding at least one thing.
“This week,” she agreed and then she was gone.
I smiled going over her reaction to me touching her. She may not want to be, but she was still attracted to me, and I planned on using it as much as I could.
The thought of Carina and the baby was still terrifying. But now, picturing the family I wasn’t sure I’d ever have, it actually started to sound pretty damn good too.
6 Carina
Dad: I need to see you in my office.
Dad: Now.
Like a petulant child, I repeated his message in a snarky voice, mocking his command despite him not being able to hear it.