As for me, I was tied up to be conquered and the people who depended on me suffered. Even if it was my fault, Robert’s betrayal wasn’t.
That’s why it’s time for me to leave the fantasy.
I straighten up and get off the bed while she rolls on to her side with her back to me.
As I walk into the bathroom, I look at my reflection when I get inside and notice the tinge of afterglow brightening my skin. I almost look human. Like I used to be. Life wasn’t perfect back then and I accepted it never would be because of the situation with my father, but at least I thought I had a future to look forward to. A guy like me with all that knowledge and skill always has a future and I had the cushion of Markov Tech.
The first blow that future of mine got was my grandfather’s death, but at least he died of natural causes. The next blow was my father’s and I almost thought my mother would join him too after her accident.
Things just spiraled after that and so did the concept of my future. Now all I see is a black hole of nothingness, so the man I’m looking at in the mirror is just a reflection of an illusion that will disappear once the novelty of being with Summer Reeves has gone.
I look away, I clean off the evidence of our wild animalistic fucking then grab a towel to wrap around my waist. I’ll come back after I send her to her room and have a hot shower. I need one, or maybe a cold one would be better for the arousal stirring again in my dick.
I reach for another towel, for Summer this time, and dampen it with some warm water for her to clean off too.
When I get back into the room I find her getting ready to slip on one of my shirts. Her dainty hands still when I walk in and she gives me a cautious look.
“I didn’t think you were coming back,” she mutters.
“Yeah. Put it on and take this.” I hold out the towel which she looks surprised to see.
She finishes putting on the shirt and takes the towel from me. I watch her clean herself and take the towel from her before she can hold on to it.
I toss it in the clothes basket to the side where I keep my laundry.
“I’m going to be away for the day,” I say, getting straight to business. This is where I have to draw a line. “I’ll possibly be away tomorrow too.”
“Tomorrow?” A touch of disappointment fills her eyes.
Of course it would, tomorrow is when she’s supposed to see her father and she would have rightly assumed I’d be going with her. I could go, but I think it’s best I don’t because I need to put some distance between us.
“Yeah, tomorrow. I’m going to arrange for my men to take you to your father in the morning and continue to watch over you while I’m away.”
“I thought you were going to take me.”
“No. My men will go,” I answer, short and without emotion. “I don’t know what the next couple of days are gonna look like so I’m going to arrange for them to take you to the funeral as well.”
At the mention of the funeral she goes pale and looks like the slightest breeze would blow her away.
“Oh, right. Okay.”
“All being well we can wrap this up as soon as possible and get on with our lives.” I know I sound like an asshole for my lack of compassion but it is better this way.
“Yeah, that would be good.” Her eyes lock with mine and she studies my face like she’s looking for something—looking for me. When she can’t find what she’s searching for she brings her hands together briefly then releases then again.
“Did something else happen?” she asks tentatively.
“No. Why?”
“You’re … just different.”
“No, I’m not different. I just think it’s important that you don’t get too… attached to me.”
“Oh… right.” Her lips press together then part and her eyes dart around the room looking at everything besides me. When she eventually looks at me the light I saw earlier is gone. “I guess you must be done with me then.”
I don’t answer but when she moves to walk by me I grab her arm and pull her back.
I should have let her go, but the conflict raging inside me is screwing with my mind.