“I want to break up.”
“Why?”
“It’s not working for me. I’m sorry.”
Cue a few tears and maybe a fleeting plea or two.
“If that’s what you want. I’ll pack my stuff now.”
A few more tears.
Load up the shit.
Done.
If only …
“Home for a nooner?” Jimmy asks while making a mess in my kitchen. The house smells like burnt butter and bacon.
“Go to hell, Jimmy.” I rush to the bathroom, plant the tampon in the trash, flush the toilet, and wash my hands. “No time to play, Cersei.” I pause just long enough to give her a quick kiss on the head as I scurry to the front door so I’m not late for my appointment.
“You look beautiful today.”
I stop, one foot out the door and my back to Jimmy who followed me.
“You look beautiful every day. And maybe I should have told you that more. Maybe I should have tried harder to make you feel loved and appreciated. Because I do … I appreciate you. And I’m going to do better. I’m going to find a job. I started looking today.”
I inch my head back to see him, chin pressed to my shoulder.
He slides his hands in the pockets of his shorts. He’s dressed. In real clothes. I hadn’t noticed when I walked in the door.
“If I’m honest, you intimidate me. I still can’t believe you ever gave me the time of day. You … a beautiful, smart doctor. Totally put together. And kinder than anyone I have ever met.”
He shaved too.
The longer I stare at him, I realize he’s also showered. I can see a tiny glimpse of the guy I met online.
“You have no idea how taking care of my mom has impacted my life. It’s the reason I haven’t finished college. It’s the reason I wasn’t a great employee and got fired. I’ve needed this break, emotionally and physically. I’ve been falling into a depression, but I’m going to do better. I’m out of it now. I’m sorry. I don’t want to lose you.”
My Jimmy had tattoos down one arm. And it was sexy. I’ve been blind to them for months.
My Jimmy had abs for days. My Jimmy was king of the smolder. All it took was one look and I lost my clothes and all inhibitions. I haven’t seen that Jimmy for months.
Now, I see a tiny glimpse of that Jimmy. But it doesn’t erase the image of the unkempt freeloader on my sofa. I recall his pathetic attempts at seducing me when he hadn’t even brushed his teeth.
No smolder.
No game whatsoever.
Some things can’t be disguised by tattoos and abs. And I know … I just know that if I have another weak moment (like so many before now), I will regret it. And it’s not just me now. I’m pregnant.
“I have to go,” I whisper.
CHAPTER TEN
“What did you find out?” Jules asks as I answer the phone in my car after leaving my attorney’s office.
“He’s going to check on a few things and get back with me. But apparently, I might have to formally evict Jimmy. I first need to give him written notice that he has five days to leave. If he doesn’t leave, I can file an eviction lawsuit against him. If I win, which I will, and he still doesn’t leave, I file a Writ of Restitution to have the sheriff remove him. God … how did this happen? And … Jules … he showered and shaved. He said he’s looking for a job. And he said all the things I needed him to say months ago.”
“Too late. You can’t. Sophie, hear me clearly. I will not let you take him back.”
“I’m not taking him back. I just wasn’t expecting him to say the things he said. For a second, not even a full second, I felt sorry for him. He said I intimidate him and expressed how he was slipping into a depression, but he’s going to do better and he loves me. It was … sweet. I mean it was half-empty boxes of stale donuts and a slew of wadded up fast food bags all over my coffee table too late, but still …”
“No! Hell to the no.” Jules’s voice escalates. “We are not going there. Nothing about Jimmy is sweet any longer. If he brings home a dozen puppies, it’s not sweet. If he makes you dinner, lights candles, and offers to go down on you all night … it’s not sweet. Got it?”
“I’m not taking him back.” I laugh. “Just calm down, Jules. I’m one hundred percent sure of that. I think it’s nothing more than a glimpse of hope that we can end this amicably as adults. No lawsuit. No attorneys. No gossip. Nothing but two people who go our separate ways. I hate conflict.”
Jules hums. “I don’t feel your level of optimism. But I hope for your sake that Jimmy surprises us and does the right thing.”