Lester took a seat on the barstool next to me, and I sighed internally. Was Rosa the only person in the world who could tell that I wanted to be left alone?
“How are you doing?” he asked me as Rosa approached to take his order. “Just water, please, Rosa. Thank you.”
“I’m fine,” I said, quickly downing the rest of my drink. I gazed at the empty glass for a moment, briefly considering ordering another. Better not risk it, I decided.
Lester stared straight ahead. “It was a nice service. The vigil, I mean.”
I grunted. To be honest, I barely remembered the vigil, even though it had only happened the day before. I had felt like I was sleepwalking through the day, still caught up in the nightmare Saul had woken me from.
Lester cleared his throat, and I braced myself for another well-meaning, but ultimately useless attempt at a heart to heart. “If you ever wanted to talk,” he said, “you know I’m always around.”
“Thanks, man,” I said. “But I’m good. Really. I’m fine.”
Lester picked at his cocktail napkin, shredding it into pieces. “You know my dad died when I was sixteen.” I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to do this. Why couldn’t he see that? “It was rough, for my mom and for me. I went to a dark place for a while. But it does get better.”
I nodded, eyes fixed ahead. Lester pushed on. “I know that things are hard, but it doesn’t help anyone to keep quiet about it.”
“I don’t want to talk,” I said finally. “I’m fine, man, really.”
Lester put his hand on my shoulder. “You’re clearly not,” he said, his tone maddeningly gentle. “And that’s okay, but you need to talk about it.”
I shrugged away. “I said I’m fine. I don’t need anyone to baby me.” I stood up.
“We’re not babying you,” Lester said. “We’re worried about you. Because we care about you.”
I sighed. I knew Lester was trying to be helpful. It wasn’t his fault that I was a miserable bastard. “It’s fine. You don’t have to worry about me. I appreciate it, I really do, but I’m good. I promise.”
Lester regarded me doubtfully. “Whatever you say,” he said finally. “But I’m still here, if you need me.”
“Thanks, Lester,” I said. “I appreciate it.”
The sudden appearance of Chris saved me from further attempts at bonding. “Hey, I’ve been looking for you guys,” he said. “Come on, it’s time for sound check.”
“Who’s opening tonight?” Lester asked as we followed Chris backstage.
Chris shrugged. “Some girl group. Last minute add-on. Here’s hoping they’re any good.”
The opening act was already onstage as the guys and I gathered in the back. Darren whistled quietly. “Who is that?” he asked.
I glanced at the stage, disinterested, then looked again. It wasn’t hard to decipher who Darren was talking about.
She was adjusting her mic stand, which was far too high for her, and totally engrossed in the task. Dark hair tumbled past her shoulders, artfully disarrayed in a way that spoke of late mornings spent in bed. In spite of myself, I imagined running my fingers through those dark curls.
When she’d adjusted the mic to her liking, she signalled to her bandmates. I couldn’t help but feel a little bad for the two other girls who had to share a stage with her, a tall woman with a beanpole figure and a shorter, chubby girl. Compared to their bandmate, they almost faded away into the background. The outfits they wore didn’t help anything: while the two backing vocalists had opted for the more obvious choice, short and tight, the lead singer’s dress was less fetish model, more pinup. It hinted at her assets, rather than flaunting them.
And her voice, damn. I had expected low, smokey, sensual, but her voice was sweet and clear, effortless. I watched, enraptured, as she led the band through their sound check.
Saul nudged me lightly. “Like what you see?” he asked under his breath.
I fixed him with my best glare. “What are you talking about?” I demanded.
Saul was undeterred. “You know what I’m talking about,” he said. “The girl. You clearly like her.”
“Shut up, Saul,” I warned. He was straying into dangerous territory, and he knew it. The others did, as well. I could tell from the way they were suddenly deeply invested in their various instruments.
“It’s a good thing,” Saul continued, ignoring me completely. “I haven’t seen you look at a woman this way since . . . well. You should talk to her after the show.”
“Will you stop?” I hissed. “Just stop. In fact,” I looked around at the rest of the guys. “I’d appreciate it if you would all stop tiptoeing around me. And if you would stop trying to mate me like a giant panda in a zoo.”
“We’re just trying to help,” Jason said quietly, placing a hand on my arm.