Her friends try to help her up, but Manda can’t seem to get to her feet or hold her own weight. Suddenly, she turns on her hands and knees and begins throwing up in the thick wet grass to the side of the walkway.
I walk up to her and stare down, my heart filled with hate. I’m determined to see her life end tonight one way or another. Like I said, I’ll use my bare hands if I have to. Don’t care.
“Hey, Tasha. I have the same question for you?” I say. “How do you live with yourself, knowing you’re such a piece of shit?”
Tasha ignores me and bends down, trying to tug Manda to her feet. “Manda, hurry up. I told you not to drink so much.”
“Fuck you!” Manda tries to get the hair out of her vomit-covered face, but it gets tangled in her fingers. And comes off. No, not her fingers. Her hair. All of it.
It’s a wig. And underneath are patches of short, scabby tufts.
Everything inside me shifts, like earth moving in a landslide. Manda doesn’t live with herself. She’s rotting from the inside out. I can see it on her face—the hollow cheeks, the bulging eyes, her sickly look. And I can’t think of a better punishment for someone like her.
“I don’t care what deal my brother cut with you or your families,” I say. “Until you own up publicly to what you did, I’m going to make sure every second of your lives are spent being reminded that you’re animals. Murderers. That you belong in prison.”
“Your family is signing,” Manda yells. “If you talk, you’ll be the one in prison for breaking a court order. Your stupid parents will have to pay back every dime! So…” Manda points at me as I turn to walk away. “Hahaha! They’ll be poor as fuck, and you’ll be getting ass-raped for breakfast over your cunt of a sister!”
I keep walking. I don’t care what she says. She’s garbage. And I don’t care what my family does, because I’m not signing anything. I’m not part of that deal, and no judge can force me to live by an agreement I wasn’t part of.
Manda. What a miserable human being, I think. I don’t know if I really have the impossible ability to make people drop dead, but I realize I don’t care. I don’t want to be like her. No regard for anyone else’s life. Besides, even if I could kill people instantly, that wouldn’t be a fitting punishment for Manda. It would be a release.
Going forward, I know I’ll step up and defend the people I love—even if that means killing someone. But defending out of love isn’t the same as killing out of hate.
The pain in my chest melts away. My heart is beating like I’ve never felt it before. Steady. Strong. Filled with conviction.
I know who I am now.
Whether it’s this body or the old one. Doesn’t matter. I can face whatever life throws at me.
I’m almost back to the front of the restaurant when the scent of strawberries fills the air. I stop in my tracks. Joy? I know it’s got to be my imagination, but I swear I can smell her, like she’s right here next to me.
A strange sense of peace washes over me, and I somehow know everything’s going to be all right. My life was meant to lead here.
I call for a ride home, and twenty minutes later I’m pulling up the driveway of our light blue, two-story ranch with the giant willow in the front yard. I’ve only been gone for one week, but everything feels different. Smaller. I know it’s because I have changed.
The door opens, and Mom’s wide blue eyes greet me. “Huff?” She covers her mouth in shock.
“Hi, Mom. We need to talk.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
“So what happened?” River asks when I call her Saturday morning, eager to hear her voice and talk. Yes, I’m referring to talking about that—the thing I was thinking about last night. Stop it. Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not actually going to do it.
That thing needs to wait until River and I are face-to-face, which is why I settle for hearing her sweet voice.
“Which part?” I ask. “The one where I confronted Manda at the resort, the one where I told my brother he’s an epic asshole for even considering settling out of court, or the part where my dad fainted when he saw me?”
“Jesus! It’s a hot-mess buffet, and I want to sample every dish. Okay, I choose Manda. What did you say, and how is she not dead right now?”
I hear a crash on River’s end of the phone. “What was that?”
“The storm. The lightning is nasty, but all the big heavy rain is supposed to hit down the coast. Now stop wasting time and tell me what happened.”