“Screw this,” Dan said. “I’m loading up. We’re out of here. I thought we’d get some footage of your stupid hotel, but I’m over it. Done. ”
As the producer stormed out, Laura turned on him. “Thanks, Eddie. Thanks a whole hell of a lot. Your business sense is staggering. ”
That was all she was thinking about? Business? She’d just broken his heart.
“I thought you had a tender side,” he told her. “But everyone was right. You’re out for yourself. ”
“And I was right, too. You’re a Neanderthal. ”
“Yeah, at least I’m not a robot. I’d rather know how to feel, and get angry, than be good at…what are you good at…spreadsheets? All you care about is the bottom line. Well, you can take your cold numbers to bed with you. ”
She stood rigidly, arms wrapped tight around her chest. “You say you don’t want anyone to think you’re a bumpkin, but look at you. You can’t just go around punching people when things don’t go your way. Talk about looking the part. What do you expect people to think?”
“They’ll think maybe I’m in love with you. ”
The bar was utterly silent. Laura was silent.
He felt it in his chest, gutting him, like silence might be a physical thing.
“You think you’re better than us,” he told her quietly. “You always did. I tell you I love you, and not even that’s good enough. ” He let his eyes lock with hers, one last time. He had to get her out of his sight. The pain was too great. “You know what, Laura? Just go. And this time, stay gone. ”
Thirty-four
Rob dallied under the tavern’s awning, putting off the inevitable.
It’d been a sort of horror…watching from a distance as a man did such unfathomable things, only to realize you were that man. When clarity had descended, and he grasped what he’d done, it’d been like rousing from a dream into a waking nightmare.
Last night, he’d left his daughter. It was incomprehensible. His sick, tiny daughter. He’d left her alone to fend for herself. Helen would never forgive him.
He’d n
ever forgive himself.
He reached for the doorknob, but it flew open, and out burst Laura Bailey. She froze, stopping short before they ran into each other, and then she gave him a look of such disgust it shamed him. “Men,” she snarled, her lip curled, then stormed away to the lodge.
Not the greatest indication of how he’d be received. He took a deep breath and warily entered the tavern. Inside, the silence was so deafening, it made his skin crawl. Was the silence because he’d shown up?
“Great,” he heard his wife say. “Now it’s a party. ”
Guilt, humiliation…it choked him. But it was a horror of his own making, and so he made himself face it.
He found her—his Helen—his eyes went straight for her. “Can we talk?”
She put her hands on her hips. “You’ve got a tongue. What’s stopping you?” So pretty she was, with that thick, red hair. That saucy body. There used to be such fire in her eyes, and he knew he was the one who’d dampened it.
“Someplace private?” he pleaded. By the time he’d made it home last night, she’d secured the chain on the door. She wouldn’t let him in. Wouldn’t take his calls. His only choice was to plead his case in public, but he hoped it wouldn’t have to be this public.
She scanned the floor, until Bear caught her eyes and gave her a nod. She led him to a corner booth and sat. “Tell me one thing,” she demanded at once. “Is there another woman? Because I can’t figure how else you could leave our girl like that. ”
“Of course not. Just you. Only you. ” He leaned forward, desperate to take her hands.
She stared at his outstretched arms like he was diseased. “That’s all you’ve got?” She bolted to standing. “I can’t do this. ”
“No. Please. ” Panic made his mouth taste metallic, made his ears ring. “Just give me one minute. Sixty seconds is all I ask. ”
She considered it for a painful moment, then sat stiffly across from him. “Sixty seconds. ” She glared at her watch like she might actually be timing him.
She seemed so far away. He was losing her. Losing his family. He’d awoken from his haze into a cold, black place. But it was a place he’d made himself. Even now he felt the itch to try, just one last time. To head to the nearest casino and finally get his big payday. But he knew now, the impulse was a madness, chasing smoke. He had his payday, and it was Helen and the kids. And they’d locked him out of their lives.