GABRIELLA
Ididn’t know where to go. First, I ran to the elevators, but they were full of businessmen I had no intention of crying in front of, so I changed directions and took off for the women’s bathroom. The door slammed behind me.
Ashley from bookkeeping was there powdering her nose and applying a fresh coat of lipstick. Her green eyes flicked to me when I came in, and she froze with her lipstick pressed to her cupid’s bow. “Gabi? Are you okay?”
I let out a sob before diving into one of the stalls and closing the door. I wanted to stay quiet so badly, but I couldn’t hold on to the grief clawing at my chest. I had to let it out. So I cried into my hands unabashedly, unable to stop even when Ashley’s feet appeared under the door.
She knocked gently. “Gabi? Do you need something? Do you want me to go?”
I sniffled and wiped away tears. This was so embarrassing. “Can you… can you find Donna for me?”
“Of course. I saw her in the break room before I came in here. Hold tight. I’ll go get her.”
“Thank you,” I said pitifully.
Ashley left, and the bathroom filled with heavy silence. It didn’t stay quiet for long. My sobs echoed off the subway-tile walls. My snorts and sniffles and nose blowing added to the orchestra of sounds.
How could I have been so stupid? I should have known Jake would be pissed. He cares more about his work than he cares about me. How have I not realized this yet?
It hurt so badly.
He’d looked at me like he hated me. Like he never wanted to see me again. Like I had singlehandedly ruined everything.
And maybe I had.
What was I supposed to do, abandon the crash site and let everyone else deal with it? What might have happened if I didn’t help?
Jake hadn’t even asked if I was okay. He saw my torn and singed clothes, and his first thought was that I’d what? Pulled over to the side of the road to roll around with dogs?
It’s like he doesn’t know me at all.
How much work did I have to put in for him to understand that I was in his corner and would be permitted a little bit of grace? Could I never make a mistake? Could I never step off the path he deemed appropriate for me?
The bathroom door swung open. I held my breath, not wanting to let on I was in here crying if the new arrival wasn’t Donna.
“Gabi?” My best friend’s voice filled the bathroom.
I immediately unlocked the stall door and pushed it open.
She saw my face and the tears and stepped forward. Then she froze in her tracks as she looked me over. Her eyes widened before flicking to my hair, my torn-up blazer, my scuffed shoes, and my dirty skin. “Gabi, what the hell happened to you? Are you hurt?”
“I’m… I’m okay,” I managed.
She rushed forward. “No, you’re not. You look like you were on fire! What happened?”
I tried to explain, but no words would come out. They continuously got stuck in the back of my throat.
She looked me over like a mother inspecting her child. When she lifted my hands and turned them over, she gasped. “Gabi, your palms are burned! Have you had someone look at you?”
I shook my head. The paramedics at the crash scene had been too busy. They had a lot on their hands. I’d felt fine. No dizziness or nausea, which I knew were signs to look out for. No pain. No discomfort. I’d had a brief headache, but it had passed.
Then again, I could feel it again, pounding at the base of my skull.
She grabbed me by the arm. “That’s it. I’m taking you to the hospital right now.”
“I’m okay,” I managed.
“No, you absolutely are not. I don’t want to hear it. I’m taking you, and that’s final.”