Chapter Seventeen
Sittingon my bed freshly showered and wearing just my underwear, I contemplate the exchange earlier. Our conversation, or rather my one-sided speech plays over and over. Had I been too intense? Should I have waited to confront Hudson. I have no idea whether I’ve done the right thing or not. Part of me thinks I have, that I was right to say what I felt, to get it off my chest. The other side of me thinks it was too much toosoon.
Picking up my comb, I begin to untangle the knots from my hair. I feel relieved to a certain extent that I’d got my thoughts out in the open, but I also feel bereft. Either way it really doesn’t matter. There’s a soft tap at mydoor.
“Come in,” Isay.
It’s Bryce and Max. They too have showered and changed. The musky smell of Bryce’s aftershave and the vanilla scent of Max’s shower gel is comforting to me. Bryce has a tray of snacks, and drinks for each of us. I guess we’re having dinner in bed tonight. An errant thought flitters across my mind of blindfolds andstrawberries.
“How are you doing, Icy?” Maxasks.
My hand falls away from my hair as my shoulders drop. “I’d feel a hell of a lot better if Hudson remembered me,” I sayhonestly.
“So would we, sweetheart, so would we,” Bryce says, placing the tray down on the side table. He gives me a sweet kiss on the lips and hands me a glass of pineapplejuice.
“Thanks.” I take a sip, then hand it back to him. Picking up the comb again, I begin to work through theknots.
“Here, let me,” Max says, holding his hand out for the comb as he slides on the bed behind me. I hand it to him and he sets to work sectioning my hair so he can get the tangles out a bit at a time. He takes great care not to tug toohard.
“How’s Hudson?” Iask.
“Hiding in his room. We won’t be seeing him for the rest of the night now,” Bryce says, settling on the bed by my outstretched legs. He crosses his legs like a little child sitting on the carpet at school listening to their teacher reading a story. You wouldn’t expect such a big man to be so flexible, but he is. He doesn’t just lift weights and run on a treadmill like Max and Hudson, Bryce likes yoga too and he’s pretty damn good atit.
“Was I wrong to say as much as I did?” Iask.
Max’s hands rest on the nape of my neck, his fingertips grazing against my collarbone.
“No, you were right to say what you did. Hudson needed to hear it. I don’t know about Bryce, butIneeded to hear it,” he says quietly. I catch Bryce’s gaze, and the frown I see pitted on his forehead. His worry and Max’s confession break myheart.
Adjusting myself so that I’m partially facing Max, I bring my hand up to cup hischeek.
“Oh, Max. I love you too much to leave. If Hudson never gets his memories back, if he never learns to love me again, I will be heartbroken, yes, but I won’t be broken. I have you and I have Bryce and I love you both so much. Perhaps, somehow, I’ve not made that clear.” I don’t wait for a response, instead I pull Max’s mouth over mine, kissing him fiercely. I sweep my tongue inside his mouth, relishing the feel of his full lips bruising myown.
Eventually, we pull apart and I turn back around so he can continue to comb my hair. Bryce is watching us both, his heated gaze running over my flushedskin.
“I guess I’m feeling a little insecure, Icy. If I’m perfectly honest, this shit has thrown me,” Max explains. “Hud has looked after us both since we were kids. Up until we met you we’d done everything together except love the same woman. Being with you, sharing you, has been fucking bliss, despite the days when I’ve wanted you all to myself. Now Hudson isn’t a part of that… I don’t know, it feels strange, odd. It doesn’t feel right, and even though it’s unfair, I resent him forit.”
“It’s thrown me too, bro. Fuck, for a moment when his head slammed against the rock I thought it was all over. I thought I’d lost him. I was so fucking relieved when he woke up,” Bryce says, opening up. He grazes his fingers along the curve of my ankle absentmindedly, as though just the touch of my skin is enough to keep him steady. My skin prickles under histouch.
“Then, when he didn’t recognise you, it was like a hole had opened up beneath me. The love we share is strong because we all share it. Having a part of that ripped away fucking scares me.” Bryce is looking down at my ankle encased in his hands. He flexes his fingers, loosening hisgrip.
“Don’t be scared. This won’t break us. I won’t let it.Wewon’t let it,” I say firmly, pushing my foot back into his grasp. His head flicks up, a glimmer of understanding lighting up his face. I don’t want his hand to pull away, I want it back. His gaze drops to my chest, as if noticing for the first time that I am just wearing my underwear. I had intended on getting dressed, now that intention has gone right out of thewindow.
“And Hudson?” Max asks, oblivious of the lustful looks passing between Bryce andme.
“Hudson will need us more than he ever has, but he’ll withdraw from us despite that. We just have to find a way to coax him back.” I close my eyes for a moment, enjoying the feel of Bryce’s hands as they massage my feet andankles.
“You’re right, he will need us, but it won’t be easy. Hud’s a stubborn bastard at times,” Max says, putting the comb down. He adjusts himself behind me, encouraging me to lean back against his chest whilst he props himself up against theheadboard.
“We’ll be there for him, like he has been there for us all this time,” Bryce says withconviction.
“Yes,” I saygently.
Behind me Max’s fingers begin to smooth over my hair as I settle against his chest. Through my back I feel the regular beat of his heart fall in time with mine. I am acutely aware of his fingertips as they work their way to the base of my skull and begin massaging there. My body’s response is immediate, the groan that leaves me is needy, wanting. At the other end of the bed, I can feel Bryce’s warm hands hold onto my feet, his thumb pressing into the soles. He makes small circular movements in my flesh, working from my instep up to my toes. The feeling is sensational, who the hell knew so many nerve endings could be found in the soles of your feet? I certainly didn’t. Another low moan leaves my mouth as my body begins to relax in hishold.
“Icy, I need you,” Max says, pressing a warm kiss against my ear whilst his fingers massage my scalp. Both his words and his touch have my skin prickling and my synapsesfiring.
“I need you both too,” I say, feeling incredibly relaxed and acutely turned on at the sametime.