–Nicholas: If she’d done that when I was in my home in Texas, I would’ve shot her dead. SMH.
–Me: He sent me one, too!
Which ruined my plans for the weekend. Amy is most definitely not going to be in a romantic weekend mood while she’s processing Brenda. But why does she need a day or two to think about it, anyway? A few minutes should’ve been plenty of time. Then we could’ve gone to Napa and had our belated wine country tour.
I hope Amy wraps up her thinking quickly. Nothing good will come of her obsessing over what Dad did. The only thing he’s good at is throwing money around and making movies. Anything else turns to shit.
–Griffin: Wow. Guess I dodged a bullet.
Maybe Joey overlooked Griffin. Why couldn’t he have overlooked me, too? It isn’t like I’m that important to Dad.
–Noah: He sent me a redhead. And she wasn’t that hot.
–Huxley: Is that what got you upset?
Palpable disapproval pours from Huxley’s text.
–Me: I’m disappointed in you, Noah. She could be the reincarnation of Marilyn Monroe, and I’d still say no.
–Noah: Of course. But you can have sex with her, then say no afterward.
Spoken like a true player.
–Grant: You’d get Dad cooties. I’ll bet you my Bugatti that he slept with the girls he sent us.
My face scrunches, but Grant is right. It’d be a typically Dad thing to do.
–Sebastian: Excuse me while I go throw up.
–Huxley: Keep the gross details to yourself, Grant.
–Grant: It’s for Noah’s own good. In case Dad sends a hotter woman next time.
–Noah: He’s not gonna waste his time like that when he’s failed.
–Me: Guys, Dad is serious about wanting a grandkid. Joey offered to send me punctured condoms.
–Griffin: Maybe he’s just sending you a box. I haven’t talked to Joey since I got my PhD.
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–Sebastian: I’m gonna kick his ass if he sends any to me.
–Me: Get in line. But we have to figure something out to stop this nonsense. All this sending women is disrupting my routine.
And upsetting Amy. She doesn’t deserve this kind of aggravation.
–Grant: Like what? He won’t stop until he gets what he wants.
–Nicholas: I’m getting myself huge guard dogs. Gonna leave them unleashed on my property.
My brothers toss out more ideas, but they’re all temporary measures. We need a more permanent solution to the problem. And soon. I’m not having another fight with Amy over some trick Dad pulls to get what he wants.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Amy
Sasha isn’t home when I arrive back from Emmett’s place. So instead of getting to talk to somebody trustworthy about what happened, I spend the day cleaning my room and bathroom twice. I scrub the toilet until you could perform surgery on it. I wipe the kitchen counter probably two dozen times. Do four loads of laundry.