“Aw, you’re a mama’s boy. Why doesn’t that surprise me?” Her smile was fucking gorgeous, dancing. “So, are your sisters coming this weekend?”
“Nah, Lottie’s due to have her second baby in a few weeks and Tess has to work and couldn’t get away.”
Addie sipped her soda. “I would’ve liked to meet them. So you chose to stay with your dad when your mom left?”
“I felt sorry for him, honestly. I would’ve done anything not to disappoint him back then. And if I’d left as well, he would’ve been all on his own.”
“But eventually you left.”
“Yeah.” And my father had never forgiven me for it.
“And you’ve never wanted to go back?”
I rubbed my hands on my thighs. “Not permanently. Like I said, I needed more, and I found it when I met The Ramblers. They’re my family as well now.”
She glanced away, and when her gaze came back to mine, I couldn’t read what I saw in her eyes. It was like the shutters had dropped. Either locking me out or locking something in. I didn’t like either option.
“Were you already covered in tattoos then? I bet you fit right in,” she said and grinned, and I could tell, trying to lighten the conversation or divert it. Addie didn’t like talking about her family, and despite her questions, she didn’t seem any more comfortable talking about mine. As soon as I said the word family, she’d thrown up her guard. Was she worried I’d start asking questions?
Addie teased or made jokes when she was uncomfortable. She’d change the subject or run off or do or say something outrageous. I usually found it entertaining, but not now. I didn’t know what was going on in her head, and I didn’t want her to hide from me. Something had caused that look in her eyes, and I wanted to know what. I wanted her to stop locking me out. But now was not the time to push for more. That didn’t mean I’d stop trying to show her who I was, from sharing how I became the man I was. “I had a few tattoos then, nowhere near as many as I do now. And yeah, I fit right in. They accepted me for who I was. It felt good. After mom left, I tried to be what the old man wanted, to make him happy. But the only time I could be myself was during those annual hunting trips with my cousins. I’d talk about bikes and show them my tattoo mags and all the places I wanted to visit. Beau was the same—he wanted to branch out. And even though Hank and Cash didn’t, they were cool about it.”
She licked her lips. “And your dad wasn’t?”
I sipped my beer. She hadn’t tried to change the subject this time. No, her curiosity had gotten the better of her, and she’d asked for more. So as much as I hated talking about him, about what happened, Addie needed to get to know me, all of me. If I wanted to convince her to give me a chance, I had to go there. “My old man doesn’t talk much, so when he does, you listen. When I told him I wanted to move away, he didn’t take it well. We stopped communicating altogether for a long time. He said he always knew I was too weak to stick it out in the mountains and to not bother coming back.”
Her eyes rounded. “That’s really shitty. I’m sorry.”
I shrugged it off. “I didn’t understand it then, I was too young. But I do now. He was hurt. His wife had left him a few years before, taken his daughters with her, then I was about to do the same. He was scared and lonely and had no idea how to express it.”
“That’s really understanding of you.” She offered me a sweet smile, and her hand covered mine briefly. “I get why this weekend is important to you.”
“It is, that’s why I want you there, Adds.” I flashed her a grin. “You’re a good friend. I have a lot of good people in my life, and I want to show him that, you know?”
Her throat worked. “Yeah.”
Everything I said was true, except the part about us just being friends. I was going to keep throwing that fucking label at her until she acknowledged what a lie it was for her as well. “I think it’ll go a long way to mending this shit between the old man and me, a start, anyway. He’s old school, so seeing me with a good woman will definitely help.”
My cousins already knew about her. I’d spoken to Beau after Addie and I spent the night together, positive I’d make her mine. Now the whole fucking family knew about her because Beau had a big mouth, and I hadn’t bothered correcting them when I texted on the way out of Rocktown, letting them know she was coming with me. I refused to introduce Addie as my friend, not when she wouldn’t be that for long. She was mine, my girl, and it was only a matter of time before she realized that as well.
“I hope you’re right,” she said, her voice turning husky.
She still wanted me. She hated the idea of me with someone else, she’d admitted it in my truck outside The Mule. I didn’t give a fuck that she’d been drunk, I’d only helped her to finally admit the truth.
I’d lied to get her here, and I felt no guilt. How could I when she was sitting across from me looking so gorgeous I couldn’t take my eyes off her.
I had her where I wanted her, and I wasn’t going to take my foot off the gas.
There would be no easing up. No reprieve.