By the tense silence next to me, I probably shouldn’t have been so honest. Because Solana really will cut a motherfucker for me or anyone else she loves. I know and love this about her. But I don’t want her protection. I just want her friendship. I want to tell her everything about my life because I’m so fucking tired of shouldering it on my own.
“You want me to poison him?” she asks, her voice dead serious.
Again, I can’t help laughing. “No. But thank you.” I turn to her and take her hands in mine. “What I want is to tell you about my world, Solana. I think it’s time I finally did.”
She releases a breath, nods, and listens to all of it. Every single secret that spills from my lips.
After spilling allthe details of my life to Solana, she and Georgie have been making frequent visits. As in, almost every day. I was nervous about telling Georgie my secrets too, given that he’s even more protective than Solana, but I didn’t want to keep lying to them or giving them half-truths. So after getting him up to speed on all need-to-know things related to The Society and my pregnancy, everything is out in the open. I thought I’d be more relieved, but I’m questioning if I did the right thing because they’re both convinced I might just up and disappear at any moment in this crazy world they still don’t fully understand.
I’ve tried to quell their fears, but honestly, they aren’t too far off the mark. I was raised in this world, so I never really realized before how insane it sounds to normal people on the outside. People do disappear in The Society. They get murdered and tossed into Tribunal prison cells that nobody knows anything about. They get poisoned, betrayed, and double-crossed, and that’s just a small taste of any given week. But even so, I had no reason to be concerned for my safety. That was until I noticed Georgie and Solana exchanging looks like they know something I don’t. When I demanded they tell me, they finally relented.
Apparently, Judge is fielding some sort of threat. Whoever tainted the beignets is after me, and they also went to Solana’s house in an effort to track me down. It’s a realization that scares me because she doesn’t have the same level of protection I do. But she assured me Judge has people watching her, which is strange. And it pisses me the hell off that he’s been hiding this from me.
He mentioned something about Abel, but since Abel has already been captured and we’re attending his trial today, I know that can’t be the case. If it was him, Judge wouldn’t still have guards following Solana or lurking in the yard outside. It has to be someone else, though I know there’s no point in asking him. I can see that today when he comes into the room while I’m getting ready.
He watches my reflection in the mirror as I apply my lipstick and smooth my hair back. His annoyance is obvious, and I don’t have to wonder why. He’s taken notice Solana and Georgie have been visiting far more often, and I’ve been waiting for him to say something about it.
“Why aren’t you wearing your necklace?” His narrowed gaze roams over the empty space around my collarbones.
I meet his gaze in the reflection. “It wouldn’t do to have Santi see it and wonder where it’s from, now, would it?”
He grunts in response, dragging a hand over his face as if it never occurred to him. I roll my eyes but try not to let him sour my mood. Santiago finally agreed to let me come to the manor before we all leave for the trial, and I have no intentions of anything raining on that parade. Not today. Judge, however, has other plans.
“Are you going to tell me why your friends have been over almost every day?” He brushes my hair over my shoulder, his fingers settling onto the nape of my neck.
“I know this is a foreign concept to you, but my friends actually like me,” I tell him. “They enjoy visiting with me.”
“And that’s why they suddenly seem to be glaring at me every time I cross paths with them?” His thumb skates over the empty space reserved for my future husband, and I shiver.
“Perhaps you need to take some charm lessons,” I suggest. “Solana and Georgie love everyone. You must be the exception.”
He doesn’t respond, but I can feel his gaze burning into me as I apply another smidge of powder I don’t really need.
“Perhaps until they can learn to be polite, I need to limit their visits to the house.”
I turn around to glare at him. “Do you get off on making me miserable? Is that it?”
His jaw muscle ticks, and he shakes his head. “I don’t want you to be miserable, Mercedes. Quite the opposite.”
“You have a funny way of showing it.” I slam the compact on the vanity table shut and stand, shrugging his hand off my neck.
I try to escape into the bathroom, but he grabs me by the wrist and tugs me back to him. I’m expecting another argument, but when I look up into his eyes, there’s a softness I almost wish he wouldn’t show me. It makes it so much harder to maintain my emotions around him.
“Today will be difficult enough.” He strokes along my jaw, his eyes moving over my features as if he’s trying to memorize them. “Let’s call a cease-fire for now.”
I release a staggering breath, and he leans in, surprising me with a kiss. It’s different from his other kisses. He’s not branding me with his intensity like I’m used to. This is something softer. Something he’s taking simply because he feels like it at the moment. And goddammit if that doesn’t feel like another dagger to my heart.
“Don’t be nice to me,” I beg him as he releases me. “Please.”
“Why?” His brows crease together.
I square my shoulders and shake my head. “Because. I just… don’t want you to.”
The vein in his neck pulses an angry beat, but he doesn’t argue. At least for now.
“We’re going to be late.” He heads to the door, leaving me to follow him. “Let’s go.”