I was matter of fact about my past as I spoke. I’d had many years to mourn Mom, to wonder what my life would’ve been like if she hadn’t died. Now, when I thought of her, it was with love and happiness, not sadness.
“Anyway. Mom’s best memories were of that trip she and her mom took to Rome. She told me that one day we’d go together. Eat pizza in front of the Colosseum and stand under the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. So that’s where I’d go.”
“You’ll make it there,” he said with certainty. “Dream big, Lauren, and don’t ever stop. The places you will go are only as small as your imagination.” Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, he brushed his thumb across my cheek tenderly before leaning down to kiss me, and in that moment, everything was perfect.
Chapter Sixteen
Jensen
As I packed the last of my things, my gaze kept wandering back to Lauren. When the dance ended, I drove us both back to the Snowflake Inn. It was our last night together, and I didn’t have it in me to say good-bye to
her at the door to her motel. Even if I convinced her to give us a chance, Mum was still expecting me to fly home for Christmas. So I’d booked Lauren a room at the inn so she’d be close to me. She protested at the cost like I knew she would, so I silenced her with kisses.
In the end, we both knew that our last few hours together were too precious to waste. She never even saw the room. We lay cuddling on my bed and talking through the night until she’d drifted off a couple of hours ago. I memorized everything I could about her as I watched her sleep. This would either be the last day I’d spend with this beautiful woman or the beginning of a new life together. All I needed now was the courage to find out which.
“Lauren, honey, I have to go,” I said, waking her gently. Her eyes blinked open in confusion and then filled with tears when she realized what was happening. Launching herself into my arms, she squeezed me so tightly that I struggled not to fall off the bed.
“I’m not good at good-byes, and I don’t know how to do this, so you need to go quickly, Jensen. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. Just go and don’t look back, okay? You are the best person I’ve ever known, and I will never forget you.”
I pulled back to look into her eyes, brushing away her silent tear as it fell.
“I have to get on that plane, but I don’t want this to be over. I can’t go back to my old life as though I’d never met you. Come with me. I’ll book another ticket, and we’ll figure something out when we get to England. There’s nothing keeping you here,” I protested.
“I don’t have a passport, Jensen. And even if I did, I wouldn’t go. We’ve only known each other a couple of weeks,” she replied, her eyes full of regret.
“Then promise me you’ll stay in touch. I’ll buy you a phone and get it delivered. We can text and speak every day. I’ll fly back as soon as I can,” I pleaded.
She closed her eyes as though she was actually in pain before opening them to answer me. “No, Jensen. A clean break is for the best. You know how impossible the distance would make things between us. I’ll always treasure the memories we made, but this is the right decision for us both,” she replied.
“I know you’re worried about the distance, but the team has a plane that will make the travel easier, and there’s no reason we can’t get you a passport so that you can travel with me,” I argued. The thought of never seeing her again tore me apart, but seeing her give up on us without a fight gutted me.
“Please don’t do this, Jensen. Don’t make this harder than it needs to be,” she said.
Her tone was so resolute that it broke my heart. I wanted to be with her more than I’d ever wanted anything, but I couldn’t make her fight for us if she didn’t feel the same.
“Then live a good life, Lauren Matthews. A big one, full of dreams and adventures, and know that I will never forget you either. Be happy. For me,” I replied.
Kissing her gently on the forehead, I picked up my bag and did as she asked. I left without looking back. As I closed the door behind me, I heard the strangled sob she hadn’t been able to contain, and I knew that my heart was the one thing I wouldn’t be taking with me. It had belonged to Lauren from the moment we met.
About an hour away from Friendship, just outside the city of Somerhaven, I slammed on the brakes as I passed a familiar hitchhiker on the side of the road. Reversing back, I stopped when I was alongside him and lowered the window.
“Gabriel, what are you doing all the way out here?” I asked.
“Waiting for you, son,” he replied, smiling. I assumed he meant that he was waiting for someone to pass by and offer him a lift.
“It’s freezing. Why don’t you hop in and I’ll give you a ride?” I said.
“That’s very kind of you,” he replied, climbing into the passenger seat. “So, where’s our girl then?”
“Lauren is still in Friendship. I’m flying back to England today, so we’re going our separate ways,” I explained, though it pained me to admit it.
“Well that’s a damn shame. If ever there was a couple that belonged together, it’s you two,” he replied.
“It’s what Lauren wanted. I asked her to come with me, or to keep in touch, but she thinks a clean break is for the best,” I said.
“Of course she did. How else could she protect you from her father?” he replied.
“What do you mean?” I asked.