We get the passes and enter the resort. Flicka attaches herself to my shoulder and then says, “The Flame Lake Sector is to the left.”
Just as I turn and begin walking, a group of holo Mighty Minions appears in a circle around me, holding hands and running in a circle as they taunt me with a nursery rhyme about death.
“Sun’s sake,” I mutter, waving my hand through them to make them go away. But they persist, their taunts growing louder and louder. “What the hell? And who brings their kids to a place like this? There’s nothing but demons and flames everywhere I look.”
“Oh,” Flicka says.
“Oh, what?”
“I just interfaced with their code. They’ve been programmed to harass anyone who is not wearing Mighty Minions paraphernalia.”
“You’re joking.”
“I’m not. Just go into the nearest souvenir shop and buy a hat.”
“What a fucking scam.”
But I do it. And the hat sets me back more than a hundred credits. I’m just about to leave when Flicka draws my attention to the Mighty Hime Princess Spa. “You should get a makeover,” Flicka prods. “That way you’ll blend in and Jimmy won’t suspect you’re a Cygnian princess.”
“Hmm,” I say, drawing in a deep breath. Because that’s not a bad idea. Right now I practically scream, Look at me! I’m a princess! My bodysuit is pale yellow right down to my pink boots and my long hair is a bright tushberry color because I ate those for lunch. “How much is it?”
“A thousand credits,” Flicka says. But I can almost hear the smile in her voice. “That would really piss Queenie off.”
“Sure would.” I laugh under my breath. “Let’s do it.”
I get the full package. The complete Mighty Minions Resort makeover. My long, tushberry hair is now red and black and twisted up into a single horn on the top of my head with holo flames shooting out the top. My formerly yellow bodysuit now has a holo projections running through the threads so it’s white with red stripes down the side of my legs just like Mighty Hime wears in the holo-cartoons. My formerly pink ship boots are now black and go all the way up to my knees. Everyone wants to look like Mighty Hime on the resort. She’s Mighty Boss’s love interest.
It was a lot more than a thousand credits and Queenie must be monitoring my spending because she sends me not-so-subtle messages on my wristband to knock it off.
I ignore her. I need to blend in. And the best part is, when I finally do leave that spa, there’s no more ring of evil holo-children taunting me as they sing death wishes.
Flicka directs me to a data access point and says, “Go find that job posting and let’s get this show on the road. Mighty Minions is creepy as fuck.”
I agree and head that direction. It takes me a little while to find his post, figure out how to answer it, and link up to my Mighty Pass, but once that’s done I press send.
Now all we have to do is head towards Flame Lake and wait for him to come to us.
We’re gonna be out of here and on our way back to saving Tycho before I can ever get my credits’ worth out of this new outfit.
CHAPTER FIVE – JIMMY
I keep checking my Mighty Pass to see if anyone’s answered yet, but no luck. I feel weird without Xyla. It’s been a really long time since I’ve been out without her. We’ve done everything together since my brothers and I landed at ALCOR two decades ago and even though Dicker is here waiting out in the docking bay, it’s not the same.
I’m not really a loner, I decide.
Maybe I’m not into humanoid companionship the way most people are, but I miss my sexbot best friend. Especially here on Mighty Minions. I’ve been to all kinds of stations and planets over the years. Pretty much seen and done all there is to see and do.
But I’ve never had to spend time on a family resort. It’s like hell for me. All these stupid kids, all these stupid parents, and there’s a ring of evil holo-minions who keep taunting me with death rhymes everywhere I go.
God, this was a bad idea.
But Dicker’s last suggestion hangs in my thoughts. Grab something to eat and wait for people to get off work.
I look around for food. The place is thick with people. Like wall to wall bodies. But I’m taller than almost everyone except the Centurians, so I can see over most of the heads.
I decide on the Evil Noodles place because it’s pretty hard to fuck up noodles, and head in that direction. Predictably, there is a line. I don’t understand this standing-in-line thing on a place like this. Hell, even on Harem we have auto restaurants where you just blip in your order and a bot will deliver it to wherever you are, but not here apparently. They want maximum parental frustration and kid meltdown.