That, and when they do, they’re scrutinized more than the perp.
It’s a messed-up system that us lawyers have perpetuated for decades.
“The kid did it, and the victim deserves justice. You know how these cases go. He takes a plea, he’ll be out in a few months, which is a lot less than he deserves, but it’s something.”
“It’s not a matter of guilt or innocence, and you know that. It’s about the law and what can be proved. That’s rule number one. What are they teaching in law school these days?”
Basically, that the justice system is flawed and sucks, but I know better than to say that to a name partner even if he is my dad.
“I know what the law is, but …” I give up because I know there’ll never be a point in trying to explain things to my dad. “Never mind. I don’t think someone like you could understand.”
“Someone like me?”
“You’ve been doing this a long time, so I guess it’s easy for you to turn off your moral compass and only focus on the law, but sometimes it feels like we’re just putting horrible guys back out on the streets and causing more crime.”
Dad approaches and leans against his desk in front of me with his arms folded.
Here comes the I’m not cut out for this lecture.
“You think I didn’t go through the same thing when I started out? You have to look at the law as a black-and-white thing. If you don’t, you’ll only drive yourself crazy with guilt.”
“I know.”
“It’s not easy, and that’s why I had reservations about you practicing this type of law.”
“Yeah, I’d be more suited to environmental law,” I say bitterly.
“I never said that to be condescending.”
Bullshit.
“The truth is, this line of work is hard. Especially in cases like the one you’ve got. This will be a good test for you.”
“To see if I can hack it?”
“To see if it’s the right field for you. You know I could get you a job doing corporate or family or any type of law you want.”
“You already think I can’t do it,” I accuse.
God, I can’t handle this today.
I cut him off before he can try to backtrack … or worse, confirm it’s true. “I need to get to work.”
“Okay.” He nods. Before I reach the door, he says, “Keep me updated on your sister.”
“Will do.”
As I leave Dad’s office and take the elevator down to my floor, all I can think about is how little confidence he has in me.
No different than any other day, I remind myself, but it doesn’t work this time.
I spend the rest of my day throwing myself into my work and sensing every single time when my heart revolts.
By the time the sun sets, I don’t think I can stay any longer. I generally don’t leave before eight thirty, but it’s only six and I’m dead on my feet. My head hurts, and I want to quit, but I don’t want to give my dad the satisfaction of giving up.
So instead, I think of the one person who might be able to pull me out of this funk and then head home to him two hours early.
* * *
As promised, I come home with a bag of Videre goodness for Anders.
The shower’s running in his bathroom when I step through the door, so I head for the kitchen to have the meals plated by the time he gets out.
I’m greeted with a gorgeous, wet, and practically naked man, who smiles wide when he sees me.
“You’re home early.”
“I am. And I brought deliciousness. Although, not quite as delicious as what you’re serving right now.” My gaze rakes over him again.
Anders laughs. “Lame.”
“Your fault for wearing nothing but a towel. Again. I swear you’re doing this on purpose.”
“I would say it’s payback for when I first moved in and you walked around half-naked, but I truly didn’t know you’d be home.” Something flashes in Anders’ eyes. Hesitance maybe. He grips his towel tight, and I realise he’s probably antsy about the no-clothes situation.
“Why don’t you go get some clothes on, and I’ll get dinner ready.” I don’t want him to put on clothes, but it’s probably for the best or dinner won’t get eaten at all.
It only takes a minute for him to come back wearing jeans and a T-shirt. “Why are you home early? Did the meeting with your father not go well?”
“Oh, that was fine. It was about my sister, not work. But he said something that made me push hard all day which resulted in burning out this afternoon, and I’m all wound tight. Was hoping maybe someone knew how to relax me.”
Anders steps towards me slowly. “Wonder who that could be?”
“No idea,” I whisper.
His feet hit the kitchen tile, mere metres away. Then steps. Then he’s right there, pressed against me lightly but not closing the gap fully.