“Were you guys fighting and stuff?” I asked. It was unusual for Mira not to confide in me about stuff like that. I didn’t know what would have held her back this time, but I was hoping it was just a fear of more change when I had just moved. “Was it bad?”
Mira shook her head, and she was staring off into space like she was watching a replay of it that I couldn’t see. “No, we weren’t fighting at all. I think that was it, you know? If we were fighting, then at least that would mean we were still fighting for something. It didn’t feel necessary to fight. There was nothing worth fighting about.”
“I’m so sorry, Mira.” I was struggling so much, having to say goodbye to Gabriel after one day. I couldn’t imagine if we were ten years in. It was a gentle reminder that I was lucky. I was getting out before the damage was too severe. “What about the house? What about Roxie?”
Roxie was their miniature pinscher, almost as old as their relationship.
“I travel so much that it just made sense to leave Roxie with him. It killed me, though. Maybe that’s why he let me keep the house. He knows I’m going to sell it. I told him I’d make sure he got half, but he said he didn’t want it, to use it to situate myself where I could get more sleep.”
That sentiment broke my heart. To care about someone so much even though the relationship was dead must be hard. “Well, you know my place is open. I have a loft only, but we could divide it, or you know, I don’t give a rat’s ass about sharing a bed with you.”
Mira smiled but was shaking her head and waving her hand through the air. “No. I couldn’t disrupt your life like that.”
“You’re never a disruption to my life.” I rubbed her hand. “I just wished you’d told me sooner.”
“I was going to. I think maybe I just didn’t want it to be real.” She quickly replaced a frown with a grin in her natural, avoidant Mira way. “I’ll be okay. I don’t want to interfere with you. Besides, a stock on the rise like you, you’ve got to have guys flooding out your windows.”
Gabriel slipped into my mind—his glistening abs beneath me, his hands, at the same time rough and gentle, on my hips—and my stomach churned.
Mira gasped. “There is someone! Who is it?”
“Was,” I corrected her. “Gabriel. Beautiful, like…beautiful. Like makes Pete look like a cabbage patch kid beautiful. He’s sweet and caring and kind.” I played our night together in my head. “Amazing in bed. He… I don’t know. He felt like what I’ve been missing, you know?”
Mira let out a hollow whistle. “Well, if you love him so much, why aren’t you together?”
I looked at her confusedly. “What?”
Mira looked back at me, equally as confused. “What?”
“Love?” I asked.
“Yeah. It’s obvious you love him.” Mira sipped on her soda. “I gotta say, I’m shocked. You’re not a fall-in-love type, you know. I mean, I knew you would one day probably, but I also thought you may end up being that really gorgeous spinster lady with lots of suitors.”
“I’m not in love with him, Mira,” I replied.
“Bullshit,” Mira spat back. “You’ve never looked like that before, and your voice got all airy. More than normal, even. Please.”
“I barely know him.”
“What? Just a few weeks or something? Sometimes it happens fast. Love at first sight and all that. I know you don’t believe in it, but that’s all the more reason why it would happen to you.”
“One day.”
Mira grumbled. “Hm?”
“I’ve known him one day.”
Mira’s jaw dropped. “Wait. What! You’re like this after one day!” She started laughing in shock. “For sure you’re in love, then. You wouldn’t be like this for any other reason.”
I shook my head. “People can’t fall in love in just one day, right?”
“Who’re you asking?” Mira questioned with an amused smirk and hiked an eyebrow. “Me or you?”
I sat staring at her in total silence.
I honestly didn’t know.
10