Living with the Bartons is the first time I’ve actually had my own room. They might not care much for me one way or another, but the reality is I do enjoy living in their home compared to others. I get to escape to my own bedroom that even has my own bathroom. It’s a dream, really. It’s why I try not to rock the boat because out of all the places I’ve been, it’s the nicest.
I always go straight to my room after school and pretty much stay there until it’s time to go to school again. Mary doesn’t even care that I take my dinner up to my bedroom as long as I bring my dishes back down, which I always do. I learned at a young age it’s better to try and stay under the radar and not be seen as much as possible.
Right now, having my own room sucks. I ate the food Connor gave me slowly, knowing the sooner I was done we’d be calling it a night. I’d wanted to stay on the sofa and keep on talking to him. I could have done it all night, which is funny because I never understood how other girls could stay up all night on their phones talking to their boyfriends. I guess now I understand it.
Connor carried me up to my room and sat me on the bed then left. That’s when I decided that I didn’t care much for being alone anymore. In fact, I hate it.
This is what I was supposed to want: to get to my room and hide away so I could read my books and maybe steal a few moments outside to take in the scenery. Now all I want to do is leave my room and go find Connor. I’m sure he’s asleep by now, which is exactly what I should be doing.
I’m tired, but all I do is toss and turn in the giant bed until I know I’m not falling asleep. I switch on the lamp next to the bed and try to read, but after I read the same page eight times, I give up on that too.
I sit on the bed and replay everything that’s happened since I got here. A few times while I ate my meal, Connor turned all his attention on my mouth. Could there really be a possibility that he’d been checking me out? My hand slips under the covers and down into my panties. I whimper when my fingers find my clit, and I realize I’m already wet. It was hard not to get turned on when Connor picked me up and carried me around like a tiny doll. I felt delicate and sexy in his arms, and he made me feel small.
My weight has never been something I’d thought of until recently when Paige and a few others poked at it. I’ve gained some weight since moving in with the Barton family. Food is readily available, and I don’t have to worry about there not being enough for all of us.
When Connor picked me up and his fingers gripped my hips, I’d never been more thankful for the added weight. I loved the way he gripped me. I felt like a woman for the first time in my life. How could I not feel like one when in Connor’s arms? Every inch of him is all man, and I’m beginning to understand why none of the boys in my prep school ever did anything for me.
I use two fingers to rub small circles over my clit as my mind creates a fantasy of Connor and me together on the sofa downstairs. I would straddle him while one of his hands grips my hip and the other digs into my hair as he dominates and controls our kiss.
He’d order me to move off his lap and onto my knees in front of him. “Connor,” I whimper, thinking about him pulling his cock out and demanding I suck him off as payment for all he’s done for me.
What the hell? I’ve never had these kinds of fantasies before, nor have I ever actually pictured someone in them. It was always a faceless man, and the acts were nothing like they are right now. To be ordered around and dominated is something new. The vision of me sucking a cock is out of nowhere, but for some reason, thinking about doing that to Connor has me more turned on than I have ever been before.
I’m so close to coming, too, when half the time I can never get myself there. Maybe it’s because I’ve been having all the wrong fantasies before now.
Swallow me down, little duck, he’d order.
“Connor!” I moan as the orgasm hits me. I keep moving my fingers to draw it out as the pleasure floods my body and I melt into the bed. He’d pull me back into his lap and kiss me afterwards, telling me what a good job I did. That I am his perfect girl and he's keeping me all for himself. That he is going to claim my virginity next.