“Rightfully so,” Vera interjected.
“But Parker is…Parker. He’s…”
“You still love him?” Vera guessed.
I huffed a laugh and swallowed down the lump of emotion that randomly rose up. Maybe this was why I hadn’t told them. I knew they’d ask questions that made me face the truth inside me. “Yeah,” I admitted. “I guess I do a little. Or I loved who he was and who we were. I don’t know him anymore.”
“Then get to know him,” Rae stated. “Play twenty questions and forge a path. He obviously wants to talk to you.”
Another laugh bubbled up. She made it sound so easy. “What if we don’t fit anymore? Or what if we do, and I get hurt again? And who says he gets another chance to know me after he left me?” I asked, some of my anger slipping free.
“Well then, just fuck him at least,” she said with a shrug.
A real laugh burst free, and I looked from one to the other, grateful for these women. “Someone recently told me that I shouldn’t make decisions from anger,” Vera said, gently reminding me of when she called me for advice about her husband.
“That someone was obviously full of shit,” I joked.
“Well, it worked out pretty well in the end. I think it was great advice.”
“Look,” Rae stated, all smirks gone. “You are a grown woman, not a naïve teenager. You’re Naughty Nova. Be brave. Be brash. Don’t let this go by without at least trying. You can try cautiously, but damn girl, you at least have to try. You don’t have to marry him, but you could at least go see him. Maybe even fool around and give me all the details,” she finished, her smirk back in place.
“Don’t you have a boyfriend now?” I asked.
“Meh,” she shrugged. “But this isn’t about me. What are you going to do?”
I looked to Vera. “Don’t make decisions from anger,” she repeated.
I closed my eyes and imagined seeing Parker—really seeing him. I imagined calling him and letting him know I wanted to meet after all his pestering to do so. With a deep sigh, I opened my eyes. “Okay.”
“Good. Now that that is solved, how are things going with Aiken?” Vera asked, like we were checking off bullets at a meeting.
With a groan, I grabbed the almost empty glass in front of Rae and finished it off.
“Sounds great,” Rae teased. “Especially if it’s making you ballsy enough to take my alcohol.”
“I think I’d almost rather talk about Parker,” I grumbled.
“C’mon,” Vera cajoled. “You can always bounce ideas off me. I’m not an influencer, but a business is a business.”
“I’m n—”
“An influencer,” Rae cut in. “We know. But you are an artist with work to sell and a platform to sell it on.”
“Exactly,” Vera added. “I know you don’t like putting yourself out there, but with Aiken’s help, you can control how much as you blend your worlds together.”
“This was so much easier to do when I randomly started them in college.”
“Oh, college, the good ole days,” Rae sighed.
“So, what has he recommended?”
“He wants me to post more pictures of me at least creating my art. That should be easy to add since I already post some of those when I paint on the road. It’s the music aspect that I’m not a fan of. I rarely interact with any of the musicians.”
“Yeah, your avoidance of rock stars is making a lot more sense. I thought it was just your dad.”
“Nope. I have ‘leave me behind’ written all over me in a language only musicians can read.”
“Lucky. I’d love to bang a rock star and have him leave me behind. No romance afterward?” Rae blew a chef’s kiss. “Perfection.”
“Anyways,” I said, laughing. “He wants me to start meeting with the bands and working hands-on and possibly take pictures with them.”
“Ew. Gross,” Vera said.
“Right?” I exclaimed, picking up on her sarcasm too late. “Whatever. It’s not…my thing.”
“Well, I hate to say it, but if you want that van you’ve got your eye on, making it your thing may be your best bet.”
I scrunched my nose and pouted like a child, which earned me eye rolls from both of them. “I do want that van. And to stay in my apartment.”
“Both are very valid reasons to listen to Aiken,” Vera assured. “You may need time to save up for your van—unless you maybe le—”
I cut her off. “Don’t even say it.”
She said it anyway. “You know we could loan you the money interest-free.”
“I know. And I don’t want to borrow money from you. I’ll eventually get there,” I promised. “Besides, Aiken is looking into the music thing and said he may have an option open to meet with a band. I told him I didn’t want my identity shared in case it all went to shit, and I panicked. So, I guess as long as he can work some privacy magic, I may be sitting down with musicians and posting elusive photos. Ugh.”