I dressed smartly in a skirt suit, actually taking the time to do my hair and makeup even though I wasn’t going to be on camera or anything. When I walked out to the kitchen, Mom smiled at me. “Mama looks pretty,” Ava said.
“Thanks, kiddo,” I said, grinning down at her. “You be good for Grammie today, okay?”
Ava nodded solemnly. She loved Maisie, but I knew she was excited to have her grandmother there to watch her that day instead. Maisie was busy, and I’d gotten handed the piece sort of last minute. I’d had to scramble to find someone to take care of her. My first thought, surprisingly enough, had been Ace. But I couldn’t just call him to ask if he could watch Ava for the day. No matter how important the assignment was.
Ace and I needed to talk, I knew, but I still didn’t know what to say to him.
I was hurt, more than anything else. He hadn’t even given me a chance to explain anything; he had just gotten up and stormed out. And then to receive the DNA test in the mail so shortly thereafter—it just hurt. I’d thought he really cared about me, but from the way he had acted, I’d been mistaken.
Over the phone, I could tell that he was upset, too. And I felt doubly guilty for not just giving in and telling him that it was fine, that we could go back to our easy relationship and not deal with the Ava situation. But I knew that wasn’t fair to any of us.
I had to figure out what I wanted before I talked to Ace. The trouble was, I knew exactly what I wanted. The more time passed, the more I realized how much I really loved Ace. I wanted us to be together, and I wanted us to have our nice little family, just the three of us. But I knew that was easier said than done.
What if Ace and I didn’t work out? He was always going to be a part of my life now that he knew about Ava. If things didn’t work out between us, I was still going to have to interact with Ace. Could I still do that, even if he broke my heart?
I wasn’t so sure that I could. Which was why when he suggested we continue our relationship for now, I had been quick to disagree. Things were just too complicated. I didn’t know what to do.
The doorbell rang, and I frowned. It was only ten in the morning—too early for the mail. I didn’t know who else would ring the doorbell. Was it Ace? I hoped not. It didn’t seem like his style, though either. He wouldn’t just show up out of the blue in the middle of the morning. He’d call first
. Whatever else I might say about him, he respected the boundaries I had set up.
When I opened the door, I was surprised to see a courier there. What’s more, he was carrying two bouquets of flowers, one addressed to me and one to Ava.
Ava’s face lit up as she shyly accepted her little bouquet. “Mama, look!” she said, as though I weren’t standing right there, looking down at her, watching her expression change to absolute glee. It was her first time ever getting flowers, and they came from her dad. I didn’t know how I knew that, but I just did.
And I felt like I was going to cry.
“Those are very nice,” Mom said as she came out into the hall. She bent over to sniff my bouquet of flowers. “From you-know-who, I’m guessing?” She gave a pointed look toward Ava but didn’t say Ace’s name, for which I was grateful. The last thing I needed was for Ava to start wondering why Ace had sent us both flowers.
I nodded at Mom. “Yeah, I think so.”
“Hmm,” Mom said, nodding. “Well, let’s get them put into some vases. Ava, you’ll help me with that, right?”
“Uh-huh!” Ava said brightly, skipping after her grandmother into the kitchen.
I paused in the hallway for a moment, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, trying to get my emotions in check. But it was hard to do. The truth was, I wanted to still be dating Ace. I did have feelings for him. But I had to remember that rushing headlong into a relationship with him was only going to possibly hurt Ava, and I couldn’t have that.
I slowly moved into the kitchen. Mom and Ava had already gotten down a couple vases, and Mom was explaining to Ava that we had to put a little water in for the flowers so that they would last longer. She clipped the bottoms of Ava’s sunflowers and started arranging them with Ava’s dubious help.
“You’re very lucky to have a man who’ll send you flowers,” Mom said, winking over at me. “It’s not every man who’ll do that.”
I shook my head. “He shouldn’t have,” I muttered.
“I know things are shaky between the two of you at the moment, but isn’t this a wonderful way for him to let you know that he’s thinking about you all the same?”
I sighed. I got the message. I needed to thank him.
It really was a nice gesture, too. I just wished that I could see it with no strings attached. Instead, it felt like accepting the flowers meant I now owed something to Ace, even though I had never asked him to send flowers in the first place.
But what was worse, that traitorous part of my mind, the part that liked to picture Ace and me together, as a couple, was going nuts now, imagining all sorts of scenarios like this. Anniversaries, birthdays, Mother’s Days. Breakfast in bed and walks in the park and watching our little Ava grow up. Together.
I couldn’t keep thinking about that, though. That wasn’t anything that I was prepared for, not yet.
Still, I called Ace while I was on my way to the interview. I at least needed to thank him. And maybe to tell him not ever to do something like that again, as much as I appreciated it.
I wanted to tell him all about the way his daughter’s eyes had lit up. The way she made Mom take the flowers into the living room so that she could look at them while she was coloring. The way that she had already started her own artistic rendering of the flowers, done in bright yellow crayon. I knew Ace would think that she was adorable, just like I did.
After all, she was our daughter.