Sadie tried to heed Crickitt’s sage advice to stop holding the sins of the past against Aiden. She tried to forget the phone call last year, tried to forget how his dismissal of her had torn her heart out. She tried to forget the weeks following, the weeks when she’d ignored his calls before they’d stopped completely. She tried to ignore the terror she still felt at the idea of losing him. He wouldn’t ever cheat on her, or leave her for her sister, but he could wrap his motorcycle around another tree…or go skidding into a field with an exposed water pipe like her father had…
Her hands shook as she pulled her phone out of her purse and dialed his number again. Then she heard it: the low rumble of Aiden’s motorcycle.
And her hands shook harder.
Chapter 16
Aiden adjusted the collar of his shirt. He’d made reservations at Triangle after his purchase and had run home to change into a blue button-down shirt and black pants. He hoped to God not to make an ass out of himself in a fancy-pants restaurant, he thought, sweeping a hand through his hair. But he couldn’t very well propose to Sadie in a steak house.
Though they did make love in a tree house…so maybe it was a safe assumption Sadie wasn’t into the five-star scene, either. He didn’t know why he was suddenly so riddled with doubt over the right way to ask her. Then again, yes, he did. Sadie spooked as easily as a wild mare. He didn’t want to blow his chance at spending the rest of his life with her because she didn’t like crème brûlée.
She opened her apartment door and Aiden’s fears evaporated. Seeing her there, dressed in a smart black skirt and pale pink top, her heels as high and impractical as ever, reminded him he had nothing to worry about. He knew her. Knew what she wanted, what she needed, before she even knew it herself.
“Change of plans,” he said, stuffing his hands into his pockets. He clasped on to the ring he’d purchased tonight. It wasn’t hard to pick out at all. The moment he saw it, it practically shouted Sadie. “We’ll take your car. You’re dressed perfectly for where we’re going.”
It was then he really looked at her face. The wide, sorrowful eyes, her full lips drawn into a pout. He held out a hand to touch her and she stepped out of his reach. The threshold of her apartment seemed to be a barrier he wasn’t supposed to cross.
“Axle says hi,” he said, his voice thin.
She crossed one arm over her middle and clasped on to her elbow, bracing herself—for what, he had no idea.
Fear and anger mixed in his throat, making his next words a demand rather than a question. “Sadie, what’s going on?”
She shook her head, dropped her arm, and squeezed her cell phone between both hands. “I thought I could do this.”
His vision blurred and he grasped the doorway for support.
“I mean, I don’t think we need to stop seeing each other,” she continued. “Just…you know. Maybe a little less…”
Faint. He was going to fucking faint.
“I appreciate you offering to take me to dinner, Aiden, but—”
“You appreciate it?” he asked, incredulous. “What am I, your coworker?”
She frowned, rolling her shoulders back. “No, of course not. I just think you and I went from zero to a hundred and skipped all the numbers in between. I need a—a break. From you. For a night or two,” she was quick to clarify.
Like that was supposed to make him feel better. “A break,” he repeated, his chest constricting.
How many times had he done this with Harmony? The start, the stall, the start, the stall. She’d ease off, come back, and he’d accommodated her each and every time. Marriage took work. Marriage took trying. And he got that, he did.
But just how much of the “trying” was supposed to come from him?
“I don’t want to stop seeing you,” Sadie continued, hell-bent on making her point. “If we could…slow down…”
“Slow down.” He was numb. From the hand that clutched the ring in his pocket to the legs somehow holding him up. “How is that even possible?”
“We don’t have to stop having sex,” she added as a caveat.
Okay, he wasn’t going to faint; he was going to puke. “You think that’s what I want? To have sex with you a couple times a week?”
She nodded, clutching her phone, and looking so hopeful it made Aiden’s stomach toss. “I want that. Don’t you?”
He bit the inside of his lip and leaned against her doorway frowning down at the welcome mat.