"Tell me about it."
For the second time tonight, I'm confessing my sins. This time it's easier because it's not just my bad moments, but also Mason's, Kasabian's, and the rest of the Circle's. Plus, I'm lying. Just a little. I tell her that Mason sold me out, sent me to a dark and rotten place. I just leave out Hell and the hitman part.
"So, that guy tonight-Parker-he killed your girl?" she asks.
"That's what Kasabian said."
"Damn. Was Mr. Kasabian in on it?"
"He's too much of a jellyfish for murder. And he's too afraid of me to lie about it. But he was there for the rest of it."
"I'd have cut off more than his head if he'd done that to me or mine."
"Then you know why I'm back."
"You're Clint Eastwood in the Outlaw Josie Wales. Max von Sydow in Virgin Spring."
"I don't know who that second one is, but if he was out to fuck up the people who fucked up someone he cared about, then, yeah, okay, I'm Max. And that's why I'm leaving."
"You're giving up?"
"No. I'm leaving Max Overdrive. I'll crash with the meth heads in Griffith Park. I'm too dangerous to be around actual human beings. I should have left that first night."
"No way. No damned way," says Allegra. "I'm in."
"In what I'm doing? No way, girlie."
She crawls off the beanbag chair and sits beside me on the floor. "Listen, I've been looking for something extraordinary my whole life, but I kept getting it wrong. I ended up in bad places with bad people, bad drugs, bad lovers, and a lot of other bad shit I don't want to think about. But this, right here, this is it. You're it. The thing I've been looking for all my life. I want in."
"Tough. I didn't come back here to be your guidance counselor."
"Yes, you did. That's exactly what you're here for. Maybe not the whole reason, but part of it."
"You're not a killer and you don't have any magic. You manage a video store."
"So, teach me."
"Teach you what? I can show you a few tricks, but when it comes to the hardcore fuck-you-up magic, you're born with that or you aren't."
"What about your friend, Vidocq?"
"He's an alchemist. It's not the same thing."
"I could learn that."
"You could have died tonight."
"I don't care."
"I'm not dragging you into this."
"You already did. And you'll take me along cause you need me."
I don't say anything. I get up so that I'm standing right over her. Earlier, I'd set the bone blade beside me on the floor. I pick it up and scabbard it inside my jacket.
"For eleven years, I've been worked over and abused in ways you can't imagine by things you don't want to know about. I've killed every kind of vile, black-souled, dead-eyed nightmare that ever made you piss your pj's and cry for mommy in the middle of the night. I kill monsters and, if I wanted, I could say a word and burn you to powder from the inside out. I can tear any human you ever met to wet rags with my bare hands. Give me one reason why I could possibly need you?"
She looks straight up at me, not blinking. No fear in her eyes.