She spoke quickly, to hide her frayed nerves. ‘Maybe this isn’t such a good idea. If we stop now we can make it look like it was just a brief...fling.’
Cesar shook his head and said in that deep voice, ‘We’ve gone too far to turn back now.’
Lexie’s heart thumped hard. Her mouth dried. Treacherously, she didn’t feel inclined to argue.
He said then, ‘We both have our reasons for doing this, Lexie...and we’re adults. This happened in the first place because we took one look at each other and couldn’t keep our hands off each other.’
She thought of what he’d told her about his half-brothers. About his desire to avoid press intrusion around what was obviously a tender subject. Even though she didn’t know the full story it resonated within her. She too had secrets to keep—dark ones. She found herself feeling a dangerous kinship with him. They were in this together.
He was sliding his hands and a
rms around her waist now, tugging her unresisting her body into his. All Lexie could feel was steel. Warmth and steel.
She put her hands on his chest. The moment felt slightly unreal. They were surrounded by the golden shimmering lights of the square.
Lexie’s recent feelings of exposure and vulnerability were nowhere to be felt when Cesar’s mouth touched hers. And they were certainly nowhere to be found in the almost shameless way she responded so quickly—opening her mouth, inviting him in, arching closer, demanding more.
There was a flash from nearby and it made her jerk in Cesar’s arms. He pulled back, cursing. A photographer was feet away, snapping them. She felt Cesar tense but he made no move to stop the photographer, who was already walking away, checking his digital images.
Cesar turned back to Lexie and there was a distinctly satisfied gleam in his eyes. ‘There goes any chance to protest that this was just a brief fling.’ The satisfied gleam became something else—hotter. ‘Whatever our reasons were, it’s about us now. I want you. And you want me. It’s that simple.’
CHAPTER FIVE
ABOUT AN HOUR later Lexie lay in bed with his words reverberating in her head. After that moment in the middle of that beautiful square Cesar had said nothing else. He’d just taken her by the hand and led her back to the car.
They’d remained in silence for the journey, as if both contemplating what lay ahead. Lexie’s mind had been slightly numb, though. Too full to be able to tease out the different strands.
When they’d returned to the castillo the dour housekeeper had met them and told Cesar that he had some phone calls he must return. Lexie had welcomed the chance to escape, pleading tiredness, but she hadn’t missed the intensity of Cesar’s expression as he’d bade her goodnight. It had set a fire alight deep in her belly.
She could feel it now. As if she’d been awoken on some deep level. This hadn’t happened with Jonathan Saunders, her alleged married lover... He’d appealed to an altogether less visceral side of her. Perhaps he’d appealed to the part of her that had finally been ready to trust again and she’d just chosen unwisely.
Suddenly that revelation made her heart beat fast. Perhaps she hadn’t lost it completely. Perhaps she was still in control. This was totally different from what had happened before. There was no hint of scandal.
Cesar had not touched her innermost feelings and secrets. He hadn’t, she told herself fiercely in the dark. He’d kissed her and she’d come alive. That was all. It was physical. And if anyone was long overdue their awakening it was her. She’d just got a little confused for a moment. Confused lust with feelings. Cesar was offering her a chance to explore this sexual attraction. And she realised with an almost desperate feeling that she wanted to. With this man.
What he’d revealed about his brothers and mother struck her again. That feeling of empathy. She knew exactly what it was like to want to avoid scrutiny of your most private self.
Cesar was a cynical being. It oozed from every part of him. Cynical and dark... She could appreciate why now. Lexie was cynical too—it had been branded onto her at an early age when she’d come face to face with the harshest side of life.
She’d prided herself on cultivating a sense of optimism over the years, but she knew that cynical shell hadn’t really worn away completely. She could be as cynical as him now. More so. She had infinitely more to gain from this than he could ever realise.
And when the time came to walk away Cesar could go back to his classically coiffed intellectual lovers and Lexie would have achieved a personal emancipation she’d only ever dreamed about.
It was that simple.
* * *
‘Thanks for a great day, everyone, that’s a wrap.’
Lexie let out a sigh of relief. They’d finished shooting their scenes in the walled garden and would be moving further into the castillo estate for the rest of the week.
Cesar had been absent from the set all day, and Lexie had been glad of the space to try and get her bearings and remember that she was here to work. But her assertion to herself that she’d been glad of the space mocked her.
She hadn’t seen Cesar since Saturday night, when he’d left her hot and bothered with that look. She’d felt so antsy on Sunday that she’d gone out for a long walk around the estate—and still no sign of Cesar.
After coming to the momentous personal decision that she would embark on an affair with him, she felt suddenly deflated now he’d disappeared into thin air. Without his unerring ability to distract her, and hypnotise her with his charisma and intensity, Lexie felt vulnerable.
She cursed herself for those weak feelings as she scrubbed her face clean in the empty make-up truck. It took her so long to get out of her costume that the base was usually quiet when she left. Only the wardrobe crew were still there, and the facility men who looked after the trailers. And the second assistant director, whose job it was to make sure Lexie was everywhere she needed to be and on time.