I nuzzle into his neck, prompting a low growl he rumbles against my face.
“Stay with me, Sebastian.”
“I wouldn't have it any other way.”
Chapter 12
T heo
I hate my sense of hearing. Do Sebastian and Clarissa not know how loud they are being? Their slams and moans make my stomach curl, and the howl Sebastian’s trying to bury makes me irate. I can’t take it any longer. I can’t sleep inn the room next to Clarissa’s if that’s the choice she’s made. I won’t sit here and listen to her and that Wolf have sex night after night now that she’s made her choice.
I storm out of my room and make my way to the kitchen and see Toshi sitting at the kitchen table. He’s eating an apple and looking at the plans he took down from the cabinet. He looks over at me, his eyes dark with the same anger I feel coursing through my veins.
“Sounds like she’s made her choice,” Toshi says.
“I take it you're not happy either,” I say.
“I’m in love with her. Of course, I’m not happy. But it is her choice. And if she wants to lower her standards for a Wolf, then so be it.”
“Sebastian’s not a bad guy. He’s just not—”
“Right for her? I agree. He’s too primal. Too basic in his needs. He won’t be able to keep up with a complex woman like her. She’ll get bored. He’ll get frustrated. She’ll want more, and he’ll get possessive. Wolves always do. She’s signed her entrapment warrant whether she realizes it or not.”
“Then tell me how you really feel,” I say.
“You want that? Because I can,” he says.
I grin as I walk over to the fruit bowl and grab an orange to peel.
“Did you love her?”
“What?” I ask.
“In Norway. When the two of you bonded.”
“Is that what we’re calling it?” I ask.
Another muffled howl careens down the hallway, and I cringe. How many times is that going to happen with them tonight? Do they both have to subject the entire cottage to their debauchery? I try to distract myself by peeling the orange in front of me as I sit down at the table.
“Yes,” Toshi says. “That’s what we’re calling it.”
“I did,” I say. “I still do.”
“You love Clarissa.”
“In my own way, yes. It’s complicated.”
“Because of the mate you lost,” he says.
“My clan wants me to take over as leader, but I can’t until I take a mate. Gia was everything. Beautiful. Intelligent. Caring. A healer. She came into my life on a whirlwind and stayed when I asked, and I couldn't have been more grateful for her.”
“I’m sorry,” he says.
“I loved her, and I always will. I heard her voice for years calling to me from the beyond. Little whispers here and there whenever I sailed from town to town. I would talk with her about why I left my clan. Why I couldn't go back after what they did to her. I clung to her voice because it was better than not having her at all. But when Clarissa and I encountered one another, her voice slowly began to fade away.”
“Why?” he asks.
“I don’t know. At first, I thought me being around another woman was angering Gia. Like she was clinging to me the way I was to her and didn’t want someone jeopardizing that. But every step we’ve taken in this journey we’ve all been on, she’s still been there. Not as apparent, but still speaking to me. But this time, it isn’t personal.”