She frowned. ‘Does no one in society know of my elopement with André?’
Hawksmere shrugged. ‘A few may have guessed at the truth of the matter, but none knows for certain.’
‘Then I am not shamed? Or ostracised?’
‘No.’
‘And does my brother know I shall be returning to him today?’
‘I sent him a note earlier informing him so and have received confirmation back from him, yes,’ Hawksmere added softly.
‘And does he welcome me back, despite knowing of my past behaviour?’
‘He holds Rousseau completely responsible for past events.’
‘Then I may return to my brother, my home, into society, without fear of rejection?’
A nerve pulsed in the tightness of Hawksmere’s jaw. ‘Yes.’
‘And you have known this since we met again yesterday, known how much it pains me to think of my father’s disappointment in me, to be estranged from Jeffrey? And yet you have continued to let me believe…’ Georgianna did not even take the time to consider her next action, merely reacted, eyes glittering angrily as she lifted her hand and stuck Hawksmere across one hard and arrogant cheek.
Zachary had seen the angry spark in Georgianna’s eyes, had noted the lifting of her gloved hand and guessed her intent. He’d made no attempt to avoid the painful slap she administered to the side of his face. Knowing he deserved it. That he deserved so much more than a single slap.
So, yes, let Georgianna slap him. Again and again, if that was her wish. Zachary would neither protest nor attempt to stop her.
‘You are truly despicable!’ Georgianna now glared across the width of the carriage at him. ‘A despicable, unprincipled bastard! Oh, yes, Hawksmere,’ she declared scornfully as he raised surprised dark brows. ‘I assure you, I heard far worse than that during my months of working in Helene Rousseau’s tavern. And you—you deserve to hear every one of those words for the way in which you have deceived me.’ She blinked back the tears as they now blurred her vision of the arrogantly superior face across from her own.
‘Perhaps we should take them as having already been said?’ Zachary excused himself gruffly.
She gave an impatient shake of her head, her hands clenched together. ‘I have spent months in despair of ever being able to see or speak to my brother again. Of ever seeing my home again. Of knowing that all in English society shunned me. This past few days of believing I would never be able to visit my father’s graveside and beg his forgiveness. A despair which you might have spared me, if you had a mind to do so. If you had a heart with which to do so. Which you so obviously do not,’ she added coldly.
Zachary had no defence against Georgianna’s accusations. He knew he was guilty of everything she now accused him of. Except perhaps the latter.
It was true he had offered for Lady Georgianna Lancaster ten months ago because he needed a wife and an heir before his thirty-fifth birthday. It was true also that he had been more annoyed than concerned at the inconvenience when she had eloped with another man. As he had no doubt also agreed with Malvern’s solution to that problem, as a way of saving himself deeper humiliation, as much as he had Georgianna’s reputation.
But he had not really known Georgianna at that time. Had seen only that plump pigeon, whom he’d decided would make him a suitable and undemanding wife, and a mother for his heirs.
The Georgianna with whom he had spent so many hours these past two days was not only a beautiful woman, but one for whom he knew he had felt a grudging admiration even before she had revealed the extent of the scars she bore, as evidence of Rousseau’s betrayal of her.
She was also a woman for whom Zachary felt desire every time he so much as looked at her.
Even now, with her looking across at him with such contempt, Zachary was aware that his body pulsed with that same desire beneath his pantaloons.
Perhaps not as proof that he did indeed possess a heart, but enough so that Zachary knew he felt regret for the wide chasm that now yawned between the two of them. Fuelled by the dislike and contempt Georgianna now felt towards him.
His expression was grim as he nodded abruptly. ‘I deserve each and every one of your accusations.’
She eyed him scathingly. ‘That was never in any doubt.’
‘No.’
Georgianna frowned her frustration with the calmness of Hawksmere’s acceptance of her anger. What she really wanted was for him to mock or taunt her, as he usually did, so that she might have the satisfaction of slapping him again.
At the same time she felt as if a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She could see her brother Jeffrey again. Could go to Malvern Hall and visit her father’s graveside and offer him her apologies for her behaviour the previous year. Could return to Malvern House if she wished. Take part in the upcoming Season, too, if that was what she decided to do.
Not that she intended telling Hawksmere of any of the lightness and elation she felt; his contemptuous behaviour towards her this past two days did not deserve to be forgiven, or forgotten, so easily.
At the same time as Georgianna knew she could never forget his lovemaking of earlier this morning.