me. The man who was supposed to take care of me beat me nearly every day for two years until I managed to get away. Sometimes we learn the hard way. He did more than rob you of money.”
I swallow against the tears. “They were just words.”
“Sometimes words hurt more than fists. Never doubt the things he said were about control, and manipulation, and I have no doubt they were untrue.”
I want to believe that, I really do. Sometimes I even do. Breathing deeply, I can’t believe everything I’ve told her. She could work for the CIA, her ability to interrogate subtly with a smile should be studied. I finally manage to bring up dinner. I didn’t think I would be so relieved when Rourke came home.
5
Rourke
When I open the door to the house, the quiet seems loud. Concerned, I move fast through to the kitchen, where I see Olivia and my mother sitting outside under the shade of the patio set that hasn’t been used in almost a year. Even in February it’s warm enough to be out on the patio; today it’s seventy-three, in two days it will be forty degrees. Mom used to go out and use the pool my father had built for her weekly. However, I noticed during my trip home last year that after our neighbor moved, Mom lost all interest in going out to the patio. Now, for the first time since the stroke, she’s my mother again, smiling, laughing. She’s touching Olivia’s hand. I always thought of my mom as small, yet her hand envelops Olivia’s.
I’m not surprised in the slightest to see them looking like they’ve known each other for years. Olivia has a calm and honest air about her I knew Mom would love. It had annoyed the hell out of me when Olivia called me out on my lie. If it made my mom happy to be friends with Hitler, I’d grit my teeth and bear it. Mom knows it too. I was never going to deny her a thing I had within my power to give her. So if she wants Olivia here, that’s what my mother will get.
Olivia throws back her head in laughter, and even secure in the ponytail, her long hair flows in the wind. Why the hell do I want her so badly? Why is my body tight with anticipation at being close to her again? In the weak sun she glows like a beacon my whole body is guided to. Stop it. Get it together, she’s now obviously going to be working here for you, which means she’s off-limits.
When I open the sliding door to the patio, they both look up at the sound. I try to keep my focus on my mother. “I’m glad to see you out here. How about we eat here like we used to?”
My mother’s smile is blinding with happiness. “That sounds delightful. I would love to. Did you get our sweet treat? I love those things, Olivia is being kind enough to share them with me so I don’t have all the calories to myself.”
“Yes, Mother, I got you your horrible-for-you dessert.”
I set down the two bags of food and the tray of drinks. My mother dives into the first bag with glee. “Okay, these two are my tacos. Two for Olivia and two for you. How cute you and Olivia have the same order.”
“It’s surprising, Mother, it’s not cute.” I shake my head as I take the tacos. I’ve already taken off my suit jacket, leaving it in the car. I undo my cuff links, slipping them into my pocket, and roll up my sleeves for comfort. Although I loosen my tie, I don’t remove it. Sitting down across from my mother, I’m careful to keep Olivia out of sight so I don’t stare.
“Well, I think it’s cute. Would you like one, son?”
“No, Mother, thank you. I do not want deep-fried chocolate chip cookie dough that is then laced with powdered sugar and allowed to roll around with maraschino cherries. If you’ll remember, I’m trying not to get diabetes.”
“Oh no, dear, pay no attention to Rourke. His father had diabetes and his great-grandfather.” I look up to see Olivia looking pale and hurt.
“It was a poor joke, I’m sorry. Please enjoy your dessert, don’t listen to me.” Fuck, I would never ever want my own neurotic preoccupation with eating healthy to be pressed on anyone else, let alone Olivia.
She shakes her head as she smiles weakly. “It’s fine. I’m fine. I’m used to it, really, it’s not a big deal. I’ve been trying to lose the same twenty pounds for years anyway.”
Everything stops inside me. “Used to what?”
Her soft brown eyes are wary as they meet mine. “Digs about what I should and shouldn’t eat. I know better, I’ve read all the books. It’s nothing really.”
“First of all, it’s not fine. No one has a right to say a fucking word about what you eat or don’t eat. It’s bullshit for someone to inflict their way of thinking on you. What you want and what you feel comfortable with is the only thing that matters. And I sure as hell hope you don’t lose those twenty pounds, because your body is perfect as it is.” It’s killing me not to reach out and touch her. Not to take her in my arms and wipe away the doubts I see in her eyes. My whole body is tense with longing, with need. I want her, and I want her right fucking now. I fight to breathe deep; this is not ignoring my attraction to her. Damn it, none of this is me. I’m an ice-cold bastard when it comes to women, ask any woman I’ve fucked for the last ten years yet one look at Olivia and the ice melts so fast there is only steam left behind.
“Rourke is right, Olivia. You are quite perfect in every way I can see. Now, come, come, dear, you promised me you’d help me with these. We wouldn’t want to disappoint Rourke with you losing an inch.”
Over the next hour I keep my eyes down, not trusting myself not to eat Olivia up with my eyes because it sure as fuck isn’t food I’m hungry for. As the chattering between them winds down, I find an opening. “Going forward, those scrubs or whatever they are called are not necessary. No uniform, wear what you feel comfortable in.”
Her eyes meet mine; melting gooey chocolate makes my mouth water to taste her. “What if I do feel comfortable in the scrubs?”
Sassy brat. “I don’t like the scrubs. Kittens?” My eyes flick down to her breasts, damn it. “Surely you have something else you could wear.”
“I do, but I love kittens, but as I’m allergic to them, I have to show my love in other ways. I have a few other smocks, if the kittens offend you. There are ones with hearts and unicorns and some with mermaids on them.” She’s teasing me.
“Interesting how brave you get when my mother is here.” At least she has the grace to blush.
Mom laughs. “Rourke hates uniforms, dear, he absolutely loathes them. We could go shopping if you need new clothes.”
Shaking her head, Olivia’s eyes drop from mine. “I’m fine, thank you. My last client hated me wearing scrubs too.”