Not that I was complaining—tonight its familiarity was a comfort. Or maybe I was just feeling all snug and content because I had Jackson’s hand on my knee on one side and Dash’s arm wrapped around me on the other as they told me about their day’s cases. Two dogs, a parakeet, two sheep and a wild story about capturing a feral cat. Music pumped from the jukebox and the beer was nice and cold.
Besides the feral cat, a girl could get used to this.
I sighed, realizing I couldn’t think things like that. I couldn’t let myself get confused just because I was having fun in Bridgewater for once, despite the verbal brawl I had with my parents. One great, sex-filled visit did not a commitme
nt make. It was a pleasant experience to be savored and enjoyed…and then walk away. My heart safe.
Savored and enjoyed. I inwardly laughed because that was so not how I should describe what I did with Dash and Jackson. And it wasn’t just pleasant. It was mind blowing. Wild. Insane. Incredible.
Yet, I was still leaving.
Jackson had to have been reading my mind because he said, “So, Avery, when do you fly out for your next assignment?”
Dash’s grip on my shoulder tightened, but he didn’t comment.
“Right after the wedding,” I said, looking down at my pint glass. I took a sip, let the bitter taste settle on my tongue.
“Brazil, right?” Jackson asked.
I nodded. “Amazon rain forest.”
I so didn’t want to talk about it. I was enjoying this moment, and very pointedly not thinking about the future. Or, more importantly, my impending departure. For the first time, a plane seat didn’t seem all too appealing. Loading up my suitcase, a pain. Customs. Jet lag. Loneliness. I frowned just thinking of it all. I felt like Scrooge, sucking the pleasure out of the holiday season.
Bah humbug.
“Will you be safe?” Dash’s voice was gruff in my ear and his grip hadn’t eased up in the slightest.
“Of course,” I said, flicking my gaze up to him. I hoped. “I take every precaution to be careful.” My voice sounded stiff and I’d automatically folded my arms across my chest defensively.
Jackson looked at Dash over my head and I felt Dash’s grip relax. His hand rubbed the area he’d been gripping as if trying to make it feel better. “Sorry, Avery. I didn’t mean that to sound so—”
“Overbearing?” I suggested. Like my parents?
Dash sighed. “Yeah, that. It’s not that I don’t trust you. Hell, you’re the most self-sufficient, independent woman I know. That’s one of the things that’s so attractive about you.”
“And your breasts,” Jackson added, giving me a wink.
I smiled at him as Dash continued.
“I just worry about your safety. It’s our job to keep you safe.”
Jackson groaned softly beside me just before I gave them a reminder.
“I didn’t sign up for that. You don’t need to protect me.” I turned to Jackson. “And you don’t need to try to keep me here, either. I get enough of that from my family. I’ll decide what I do with my future.”
“We know,” Jackson said quickly, putting his palms flat on the table as if he were afraid to touch me. “And we apologize if we’re too heavy-handed. It’s just—”
“We know what we want,” Dash finished. “We’ve been waiting a long time to find The One, and you’re it, baby doll.”
Wow. Okay. I hadn’t expected that. The words were impossible to ignore. They had a physical effect on me, making my chest tighten and my heart beat faster. Such pretty words, but that didn’t change anything. I knew what they were talking about—the Bridgewater way. They wanted me to settle down. Settle down. Two words that made me cringe no matter how much I loved the thought of being with them. Having them protect me as much as they wanted. To be wanted.
“I suppose you guys think I should quit, right? To come back here and just give it all up. Maybe be a waitress like Jackie.” I laughed softly but there was no humor in it. They wanted me to give up a part of myself to be together. They just didn’t understand. No one did. “Join the club.”
Jackson’s hand cupped my chin and gently turned me to face him. “That’s not what we’re saying at all. And don’t lump us in with your parents.”
I stared at him, brow furrowed. He looked so sincere. Turning to face Dash, I saw he was nodding in agreement. “We told you this before. We’d never ask that of you. You clearly love what you do and we support that one hundred percent.”
“We’re proud of your accomplishments,” Jackson added, giving a quick wave to someone across the room.