“But princess, remember what I said before. If you need to come, I’ll give it to you. Even from far away. Don’t go seeing the Englishman you have over there.”
I stiffened, my fingers gripping the phone. “I don’t know what you’re—”
“Harper. I don’t give a shit what you’ve done in the past, hell, who you’ve done in the past. Do I wish no one’s had their hands on you before? Of course. But I won’t be an asshole when I’ve got a past, too. I don’t let that matter, and I won’t let what you’ve done matter either. But I’ll give you what you need now and keep you safe doing it.”
He could see too much. He couldn’t really know about Giles—he hadn’t even known I was out of the country—but he’d seen me with Larry. Knew what I was going to do with him, how it hadn’t meant anything, just a chance for me to forget for a few minutes. Reed had seen it in the stairwell, knew I’d probably have someone here in the UK, too. I didn’t want to tell him he was right. I wasn’t ready for it, even though I’d broken down on his lap. Gave me a release, in a way almost better than an orgasm.
I didn’t know how to respond without revealing any more of me, so I ended the call without saying anything at all.
11
REED
After tossing the cell onto the passenger seat, I closed my eyes, wrapped my fingers around the steering wheel. I was parked across the street from where I grew up in the shitty part of town. The house was gutted. The windows had been shattered on the second floor, the lower ones covered in warped wood with graffiti sprayed on it. The brick facade was chipped and starting to collapse. It was t
oo dark to see the smoke damage, but I knew it was there. The houses on either side were vacant and abandoned, too. Hell, almost every one on the street gutted.
All was quiet, but that was deceiving. Steam rose from the manhole covers, proving it was too cold to be outside, even for the rats that usually darted out to find food. Not that anyone smart would be walking the streets in this part of town after the sun went down. It wasn’t a safe place. No, it was rough like me. One had to be ready for anything here. Rough and ready, that was me. Old cars lined both sides of the road, the street lamp was blown out in the center of the block, and I had to wonder if it was a new development or if the city crew refused to come here to replace it.
This block was my past. My fucked-up childhood. Rough streets, rougher home life. In my mind, I saw my father’s angry face, heard his vicious words, felt the hot sear of his belt. There was no forgetting my mother’s drunk gaze as she let it all happen. The gym was an hour from here, but it could have been a world away. It was my life now, yet this shithole still close enough where it could easily come back to haunt me. I didn’t want to be back, but I couldn’t shake the two men who’d camped out in the gym’s lot. They’d done nothing, just sat there and watched us then eventually left. One minute they were there, the next time I turned around, gone.
It couldn’t be just a one-time thing. Not a chance in fucking hell.
Gray had shit with his dad. Old shit. I’d never met the man, but I knew he called Gray out of nowhere just to fuck with him. The asshole had him watched. Followed. He bet against his fights. And that was all since Gray returned from his army deployments. What happened when he was a kid… he didn’t speak about it any more than I shared my own past, but it had been fucked up.
But after last summer’s deal with Emory and the drug dealer who’d gone after her, the man had left Gray alone. Supposedly, Quake Baker had something on the dad, enough to make the bastard afraid. Afraid enough to leave his son alone. It helped that the older man was president of the No Holds Barred MC. I couldn’t see Gray’s dad stirring shit up now out of the blue. That left me. The men in the car had to have been there for me. But why?
My dad was dead. I’d seen to that. My mother had died a few years ago, her liver finally giving out on her in some women’s shelter. The crowd I’d run with back in the day weren’t part of a gang, at least they hadn’t been years ago. The men in the car? Not gang members.
This place was tainted. I was tainted, and I’d taken Harper’s call from here, staring out and seeing my past. When her name lit up my cell, I felt… happiness. Happiness in this hell hole. It only made me see all of the differences between us. Privilege and poverty. Brains and brawn.
I wanted Harper. Fuck, any man alive would see her long legs and wish they were wrapped around his waist. It was more than that. I wanted to hear her voice, see her smile. Make her fucking happy.
I’d told her I wasn’t looking for a relationship. I hadn’t been, never considered myself more than an easy lay for a woman who wanted a good time. Now, that held no appeal. No woman interested me but Harper. Somehow having her far away, unattainable, made me change my thinking. I may not have been looking for one, but a relationship had found me. I wasn’t walking away from Harper or her shit ton of problems. I’d take them from her, make them mine. They couldn’t be worse than anything I’d seen or lived through. I could handle it. Did that make me whipped? Fuck, yes. I had no idea how it happened or why I’d changed my thinking so damn quickly, but I wanted more from Harper.
A car passed, a cigarette flung out the window, the red glow of the tip the only color on the street. Harper deserved more than this. She deserved a guy from the country club who wore golf shirts and played squash on the weekends. A lawyer or some other high paying, career-driven man who could give her the lifestyle she was accustomed to.
This? Me? A fighter from the other side of the tracks who had a record and earned his salary with his fists? As I glanced one last time out the window before driving off, I had to wonder, would I ruin her?
12
HARPER
Cam: Where are you?
My brother’s text ruined my morning. His three words had me distracted, and I offered nothing to the meeting I was in. When my colleagues had turned to me for a response, I’d offered a fake smile and blamed my lack of focus on jet lag. I had slept after I’d talked with Reed, surprisingly, but morning had come too quickly. The three cups of coffee I’d had did nothing to make me alert. But one text from Cam had my mind spinning, my heart pounding. Even if I put my head down on the table, I wouldn’t have been able to sleep.
I refused to respond. There was no need. Cam didn’t know where I was, couldn’t touch me.
Cam: Your apartment is dark.
I clenched my phone when the second text came through a few hours later. We’d just returned from lunch at the nearby pub. I stood in the hallway, staring down at the words. My heart pounded so hard, it hurt. My lunch was debating whether to come back up. Cam was still in jail. I would’ve heard if he’d been released early. My mother would have called, cajoled once again in coming to her stupid party.
No, he was still in jail. Until tomorrow.
Then how did he know about my apartment? If he wasn’t watching it, then someone else was. Had he hired someone on the outside to spy on me? Was someone else looking for me and pestering my brother? I wouldn’t put it past the men he owed money to, and I wouldn’t put it past my brother to offer me up again. But why had I been safe before now? It had been almost two years. I shivered, cold even in my cashmere turtleneck.
“I’m surprised you’re here after term.”