While he was in the bathroom, I psyched myself up for the rest of the evening. It was dark out so I didn’t run the risk of really being seen until we got to the theater. It would be dark inside, but the lobby was still a problem. If any of my friends spotted me with a brother with platinum hair and a bama outfit on, I’d never hear the end of it.
I heard some strange noises coming from the bathroom and then I realized he was straining; letting out loud moans while he was trying to pass a turd. That was disgusting! Even if it meant him being another ten or fifteen minutes later than he was already, he should’ve found a public restroom and handled that business before he fell up in my place.
The toilet finally flushed a few moments later. I heard the door swing open but I didn’t hear any damn water. No his nasty ass did not come out without washing his hands? That was the second time I’d witnessed his bathroom habits and we still hadn’t been out on a date yet.
“You ready?” Conquesto asked, walking back out into my living room.
“Did you find the soap okay?” I wanted to see what his nasty ass would say. “I think I put a new bar out in the dish.”
“Yeah, yeah, I found it okay,” he lied.
I could put up with a lot of nonsense when it came to men, but poor hygiene was out of the question. I was going to endure the date, but Conquesto would never see me again. That was the bottom line.
On the way to the Loews Cineplex Dupont, the springs in Conquesto’s jacked-up car, a big ass 1972 Ford, ripped a small hole in my sweat pants.
It was a good thing I didn’t get all fly for him. If I’d ripped a hole in something expensive or, worse yet, unique and irreplaceable, I would’ve gone into bitch mode for the rest of the night.
As it turned out, I had to wake my bitchy alter ego from her slumber anyway. Conquesto got into line at the box office while I stood over to the side to wait for him. He looked at me like I was crazy.
“You gonna get your ticket, or you want to give me the money so I can get it?”
I couldn’t believe he’d said that to me. He actually thought he was going to play Mr. Cheap with me.
“Um, Conquesto.” I scooted closer to him so other people wouldn’t be privy to what I was about to say. “You might not know this, but it’s customary for the person that initialized the date to pay. I’m not saying that the woman should never pay, but you asked me out tonight. Get what I’m saying?”
“Damn!” He got all loud on a sistah. People immediately started being nosy. “You mean you can afford to pay Boom a grip every week to get your hair done, but you can’t buy your own movie ticket?”
“Oh, I can afford it,” I replied vehemently, getting loud myself. “I can also afford a taxi to take my ass home. Later.”
I headed for the exit onto Nineteenth Street. He must’ve thought he was taking a desperate hoochie out on a date. I’d show him.
“Rayne, hold up!” He came running up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. “I got your back, woman!”
I yanked away from him and his nasty, shit-infested hands. “I don’t need you to have my back. I have my own back. Thank you very much.”
“Look, I’m sorry.” Oh boy, now he was going to start begging. “I didn’t mean to cause a scene. Let’s go back inside and I’ll happily pay for your ticket.”
I didn’t budge.
“It’s just that money’s kind of tight for me right now. You’ve seen my ride.”
“I’ve seen and practically been cut up by your ride,” I replied, referring to the hole in my pants.
“I got a J-O-B, but it’s hard to get hooked up with something major when you’ve just got out.”
“Got out?” Now that comment warranted my attention. “Got out of where? Prison?”
“Yes. I only got out a couple months ago. Didn’t Boom tell you?”
“No, the hell she didn’t. What were you in prison for?”
“My boyz and I got messed up in slanging dope, thinking we were the shit and untouchable. In fact, we called ourselves the Untouchables. We were running smack out a rowhouse in Southeast. That shit grew old quick and we all went down; one way or the other.”
“What’s that mean?”
“That means that three of us went to jail and five of us went to the cemetery.” He shoved his hands in his pockets—thank the Lawd—and started looking down at the ground in an effort to avoid eye contact. “Much as I hated getting locked up, I’m one of the lucky ones. At least I still have breath in my body.”
There I was faced with a dilemma; all because of my destructive habit of wearing my heart on my sleeve. I could’ve gone home, telling Conquesto thanks but no thanks for the date, or I could stay, grin, and bear it. My dumb ass stayed.