I swallow roughly. Don’t be a horndog, Hel, I tell myself. You didn’t come in here to get into his pants. Answers. You want answers.
I came in here to ask him what his motives are. What is he doing? Everyone has made it more than clear that, despite this draw between us, despite the fact that I was fated to be his mate, that’s not going to happen. He gave up his chance of cementing that bond, of claiming me for his for eternity when he made his sacrifice to Siúcra.
I thought I was okay with just being friends. And maybe, in time, I will be. But I haven’t been able to turn off my feelings for him yet, and after the way he touched me earlier, I’d do anything to get him to touch me again—but only if he wanted to.
Besides, who says we have to be mates to enjoy each other? I’m grown. He’s grown. We’re both consenting adults and, after the hell I’ve been through these last three weeks, I just want to have someone touch me like they care.
He came all the way into the Unseelie Court to rescue me, then brought me to his house where he has a room all ready for me.
He has to care.
Right?
Forget asking him questions about his motives. Suddenly, I don’t give a crap. He’s half-naked, I’m wearing a sheer nightgown, and that bed looks extremely inviting.
I tip-toe toward him. Right when I’m about to reach out and stroke the top of his beautiful tawny hair—something I’ve been dying to do ever since he lowered his hood—Rys dodges my hand. He gets up from the bed, taking a few purposeful steps away from me.
I’m not deterred. Not yet, at least.
“You keep talking about what you have to do. Just once, Rys, why don’t you do what you want to do.”
It’s a dare. We both know that. After I threw it at him, he goes absolutely still, his back tense, his slender finger clenched tightly together.
He doesn’t turn around.
I zero in on his hands. There’s only one reason why he’s fisting them together like that.
“What’s the matter? Don’t you want to touch me?”
Yeah. I really did just put it out there like that. But what else can I do? If I leave it up to Rys, he’ll draw further and further away until, one day, he’s gone again. I have to take my chance while I can.
Rys keeps his back to me. “You don’t want me to answer that.”
Yes. I do.
Still, I’m kind of pissed. It was bad enough when he was keeping his distance while we were rushing out of the Shadow Realm. After our game of questions, I know that he’s adamant that he can’t have a soul mate, but that still doesn’t explain how easily he was able to abandon me. Then there was that charged moment in my new bedroom, followed by how quickly he ran from me. Maybe I want to believe that my impulsiveness meant I only wanted to continue our game of questions from yesterday morning.
But, while humans lie all the time, I don’t want to lie to myself. Not anymore.
I knew exactly what I was hoping for when I walked into his bedroom.
Now I just have to get it.
“I’m a big girl,” I scoff. “I can handle the rejection. I just want you to be honest with me, Rys.”
As if he has any other choice. If he answers me, it’s either the truth—or a clever way of talking around it.
If he answers me.
I can’t see his expression. I don’t know what he’s thinking. He stays silent, the ends of his long hair swaying just above his ass as he gives his he
ad the tiniest jerk.
“Do I want to touch you, Leannán? More than anything in this world or any other.”
Oh.
Okay, then.