“Soon.” He continues our brisk pace down the hallway. “Trust me.”
I stare at him sidelong, trying with all my heart to do just that. Trust that what I’m about to do is right and that Devlan will forgive me. I clamp my eyes shut and allow Sebastian to lead as I envision my father’s pale face, and I pray for his forgiveness.
My father’s smile—the smile he wore before he became Taken—breaks through the pain, chips away at my hatred for King Hart. His arms wrapped around me, cradling me to him when I was a girl. He read me stories. He tucked me in, whispering about freedom.
A smile takes over my face.
If I kill King Hart, I will be no freer than I am under his rule. I’ll be no freer than if I was sent to that damned compound and fed to the cannibals. I would become a slave to my anger, to hate. My vengeance on the man who took my father would not be sated by his death. It would destroy me in the end.
No. Madity is right. Even with all her skittish misgivings, she has always been wise, and she’s always seen what I could not while blinded by my hatred. Devlan didn’t try to postpone the mission because he feared I wasn’t ready, nor did he try to take my place because he felt I would fail.
He knew what I’m only just now seeing, that killing Hart would sever something inside me. Just as Hart tried to make Sebastian sever his compassion, I’d destroy the part of me that forgives and trusts and believes in people, the part of me that makes me strong.
That’s the strength Sebastian saw in me. The silent strength he spoke of at the meadow.
He asked me if I thought that part of us weakens us. I understand now that it doesn’t.
I can do what’s right for Sebastian. For Devlan. For all of Karm, and for myself. Make a choice. Go against Hart, the Force, the Rebels—
I can choose.
I open my eyes with renewed determination. “Sebastian,” I say tersely, trying to gain his attention. I glance around, noticing that he’s taken me to the other side of the castle. And not just the wing, but the end of the wing. There’s nowhere to go.
A stained glass window shows the outside, darkening as the sun dips lower. I’m running out of time.
Sebastian reaches out and places his palm to the floorto-ceiling window. It ripples, and the waves of glass pull apart like a curtain—no, a screen. A metal door slides open, revealing a large lift.
He pulls me inside, then hits a blue button on the side of the metal casing. The door slides shut with a heavy, metallic clang. I jerk. “Where are you taking me?”
His eyes meet mine, shining gold in the bright light. “To meet the king.”
THIRTY-ONE
My heart slams to my feet as the lift shoots up. Sharp spears of panic stab my chest, and I yank my hand from Sebastian’s. “No, Sebastian. I can’t.”
A smile crooks his lips. “It’s all right, Zara. There’s nothing to fear. I know how you feel about marriage. How important it is to you.” He sighs. “I want you to know that you’re part of a family now. That my father’s blessing will—”
I smash my hands against the buttons—all of them—and the lift bangs to a stop. The doors stay closed, and we start to descend.
I relax against the cold wall and close my eyes.
“Zara?” Sebastian roars. My eyes snap open. “What are you doing? You’re acting mad.”
“I am, Sebastian.” I palm his cheeks, pull his face level to mine so our eyes meet. “And for once, you must trust me.”
His eyes search my face, and he presses his lips together. When the doors open, I tug him into the hallway and sweep the perimeter. “Where can we talk that isn’t monitored?” I whisper.
He groans. “Here.” He opens a door to our left.
Hesitantly, I follow him into the chamber. He opens a glass case and inserts a key into a keyhole along the wall. After he enters a code into the dial pad, he faces me. “The Eyes are down. Now what is this about?”
I take his hand and lead him to the bed.
“Zara, you don’t have to prove yourself right now.” His lips quirk into a side grin. “I can wait till tonight.” He pulls me closer and slides his hand into my hair.
I bat it away and glare at him. “Honestly, Sebastian. Is that the only thing your mind thinks of?” Shaking my head, I lower him into a sitting position so that my eyes meet his straight on. “I have much to confess to you.”
His brow furrows and his lips part, but I press on. “I know of your father’s project. All of it. I know about Outside, and the Taken. About the Virus…and about the Rebels.”