He was exceedingly thankful when she accepted that comment with a humph. She stared ahead, then he felt another of her considering glances.
"I won't break, you know. I won't have hysterics, or-"
"Very likely." He uttered the words as repressively as he could.
She humphed again. "Well, I still don't understand. If you want to marry me anyway…"
He couldn't miss her implication-couldn't stop himself from turning his head-and reading, blazoned in the blue of her eyes, her curiosity, and a very definite invitation…
Swallowing a virulent curse, he swung his gaze back to the lane. Explaining might just have made things worse. He'd thus far managed to hold his demons in check-but what if she picked up the whip?
Oh no, no, no, no, no. He knew what he was, and what she was, and they were literally eons apart. It would take her years-at least an intensive six months-to even come close to comprehending the level of sexual knowledge he possessed. But he could guess what she was thinking, what route her innocent thoughts had taken. He had to head her off, quash any thoughts she had of jumping into that particular sea feet first. It simply couldn't happen like that. At least, not with him.
Unfortunately, at no point had she become wary of him, much to his disgust. She'd somehow gone from regarding him as an uncle to regarding him as an equal. Which was equally erroneous. His jaw ached, along with most of his body. As for his brain, that simply hurt. "It's not going to happen like that." The effort of explaining things he didn't want to risk thinking about was wearing him down.
"Oh?"
She had those Ohs down to a fine art-they always prodded him to explain.
"Desire leads to physical seduction but, in your case-in our case-that is not going to translate to any quick, rushed, illicit tumble in a courtyard or anywhere else."
He waited for her Oh; instead, she asked, "Why?"
Because he was going to train her to be his very own fallen angel. He shook aside the thought. "Because…" He struggled, then blinked; if he hadn't been driving, he would have flung up his hands in defeat. Setting his jaw, he reached for the whip. "Because you're an innocent, and you deserve better than that. And I know better than that." Oh, yes-this impinged on his ego as well. "I'll seduce you as you deserve to be seduced-slowly. Innocence isn't something you should discard like an old shoe. It has a physical value-a passionate value-all its own."
His frown deepening, he kept his gaze fixed on his leader's ears. "Innocence shouldn't be tarnished, it shouldn't be crushed. It should be made to bloom. I know." Those last two words were as much realization as assurance. "Getting innocence to bloom takes time, takes care and attention and expertise." His voice deepened. "It takes passion and desire, commitment and devotion to coax innocence from bud to bloom, to encourage it to unfurl into full flower without a single
petal bruised."
Was he still talking of her innocence, or did he mean something more-something of which he was as innocent as she?
To his relief, she said nothing but sat silently and considered. He considered, too-all that he wanted, the totality of his desire.
He was acutely conscious of her sitting beside him. He could feel his own heartbeat, thudding in his chest, pulsing in his fingertips, throbbing in his loins. For long moments, the only sounds about them were the steady clack of the bays' hooves and the repetitive rattle of the wheels.
Then she stirred.
He shot her a glance, saw her frown-saw her open her mouth-
He jerked his gaze forward. "And for God's sake, don't you dare ask why."
He felt her glare; from the corner of his eye, he saw her stick her nose in the air, shut her lips, primly fold her hands, and pointedly look over the landscape.
Jaw clenched, he whipped up his horses.
By the time they reached the gates of Hillgate End, he'd regained sufficient use of his brain to remember what he'd intended to tell Flick during the drive.
Setting the bays pacing up the shady avenue, he slanted a glance at her and wondered how much to reveal. Despite his distraction with her, he hadn't forgotten about the syndicate; he knew she hadn't, either.
The truth was, he was growing uneasy. They'd been following Bletchley for weeks and had learned nothing about the syndicate other than that it appeared exceedingly well organized. In the circumstances, he didn't feel happy about fixing all their hopes on Bletchley.
So he'd racked his brain for alternatives. He'd considered requesting help from the rest of the Bar Cynster but had yet to do so. Vane and Patience were in Kent; Gabriel and Lucifer were in London, but needed to keep their eyes on the twins. Richard was, at last report, rather busy with his witch in Scotland. And Devil would be busy with spring planting. Be that as it may, Devil was reasonably close at Somersham. If things got difficult, he'd call on Devil, but, given that all matters to do with racing fell within his particular area of expertise, there seemed little point in summoning aid just yet. He needed to sight the enemy first, before he called in the cavalry.
To which end…
He drew the curricle up before the steps with a flourish and stepped down. Taking Flick's hand, he helped her alight, then fell in beside her as she headed for the steps.
"I'm going to London tomorrow-there's some business I need to see to." He stopped at the base of the steps.