“Well, you did stand me up at the bar,” I accused.
“Shit, I know,” she said. “I guess I wanted to make up for that last night, but you weren’t home. Mind telling me where you are? Please don’t say you’re on a cot in a homeless shelter. Because you refused to stay with me or your parents.”
I laughed and poured the steaming coffee into a mug, debating how I wanted to deal with Tammy’s interrogation. “Eh, it’s not so bad,” I said. “Me and the dogs fit nicely on one bed.”
“I’m not laughing, Jaime. I’m serious. Where are you?”
“For now, all you need to know is that my four dogs and I are safe and sound, for a few weeks, if not longer.”
“Safe and sound? Good. But where?” she pushed.
I sipped my coffee as I walked through the house and looked at the boxes stacked in the entryway. “Tammy, I appreciate that you care, but can’t you just trust me? My landlord was an asshole anyway, so this is for the best.”
There was silence on the other end before she shrieked so loudly that I nearly dropped my cell into my coffee; to avoid such a smartphone fate, I jerked violently, spilling the precious caffeinated life-blood all over the place.
“Charlie!” she squealed. “You’re staying with Charlie, aren’t you? Oh my gosh! I knew it! I knew you were gonna jump on his crazy deal eventually. Tell me, have you jumped on him yet?”
“No, we’re just friends.”
“When’s the wedding? I’m going to assume I’m your maid of honor, right?”
“Tammy, slow down,” I said. “I didn’t say yes, and we’re not getting married,” I muttered and glanced up the stairs, expecting Charlie to appear out of nowhere. “He offered me a place to stay until I can get a new job and get back on my feet. That’s it.”
“Whatever,” she said, probably rolling her eyes as exaggeratedly as I was rolling mine.
“Believe what you want, but the second I find a damn job, I’m gone.”
“I don’t understand why,” she argued. “You’ve finally got a chance to make a move on the man you’ve been in love with for years. You should be thrilled about this. It makes no damn sense that you want to leave.”
I knew she was right, but I didn’t want to admit it. With a sigh, I opened another box and spotted my laptop. “I’m not sure he feels the same way,” I said as I pulled the computer out and tucked it under my arm. I picked up the remainder of my coffee from the side table, let out another frustrated sigh as I gazed into the half-empty cup, then plopped down on the couch and opened my laptop to power it on. “I mean, he keeps saying he wants me, but wants sex and a wife. I just... I don’t know, Tam.”
Tammy laughed quietly, in a way that made me wish she was in the same room so I could throw a pillow at her face. “You want romance. Is that it?”
“
Yeah,” I said and sagged into the cushions of his expensive sofa. “I want to know that he actually wants to be with me for me and not for this damn deal of his or for sex...though the sex would be incredible,” I mused, thinking of the muscular body lying upstairs right that minute, half naked and adorably snoring along with the dogs. My hands itched to feel him again, as I had at the fencing club. I could almost feel his lips on mine as we kissed hotly. I wanted the fantasy to go so much further, but I managed to stop it with a bitter frown. “Damn, I really need to get out of his house.”
“No you don’t. You need to stay there and tell him the truth,” Tammy said sternly. “This has dragged on too long already. Just tell him what you feel or what you want to feel,” she said with a naughty giggle, “and see what happens.”
“And what if he laughs in my face and tells me I’m crazy?”
“Jaime, has Charlie ever done that?”
“No, but—”
“Exactly. He didn’t even laugh at you when you were a zit-faced little teenager, sniffing after him like those dogs of yours. You know you can be completely honest with him.”
I opened my mouth to disagree, then shut it quickly. “You’re right,” I muttered, because she was. In all the years Charlie and I had been friends, he’d never once laughed at me, not even when I laid my emotions bare. I’d cried on his shoulder, laughed with him at stupid things, and told him more secrets than my diary knew, all except for those secrets about him. Not once, in all that time, did he dismiss me or laugh it off or spread rumors. So why the hell am I holding back now?
The trouble was that I knew the answer to that question. I knew exactly why, and that hovered over me like a dark cloud. I was scared that if I poked it too hard, it would burst and ruin everything I’d found with Charlie again. I didn’t want to lose my friend, but I knew he’d only come back home to Blue Ridge for one reason, and it had nothing to do with me. My annoyance rose another notch when I realized he wouldn’t have bothered finding me again if I hadn’t broken into his damn house in the first place.
“Tammy, I have to go,” I said.
“What? Why? I want details, damn it!”
“Like what?”
“Like...what the two of you have been doing there.”