Fortunately, she quickly found a way to guide her rage elsewhere, toward someone who literally ha
d no idea what we were talking about but inadvertently opened his office right in the middle of the shit-storm.
“How the hell could you do this to me?!”
Caleb leaned back as far as his chair would go, blinking warily between the two of us. For a second, it looked as if he might consider making a run for it, but he was held prisoner by the important client on hold, and we were roadblocks between him and the door. With no other option, he ventured forward and took a tentative stab at the usual pleasantries. “Uh...good morning?”
We glared back at him in one accord but each for our own reasons: I needed an irrational scapegoat on which to unload all my pent-up frustration and Madison was simply amused by the uneasiness etched all over his face.
“Don’t you ‘good morning’ me, mister!” I snapped. “Tell me, Caleb, how is it fundamentally possible that after watching me stumble through week after week of confusion and stress, you didn’t make the connection that the magical man I was talking about wasn’t Robert, that guy who didn’t recall anything I talked about, but was, in fact, his twin brother?!”
A look of dawning comprehension spread across Caleb’s handsome face and crept the corners of his lips up into a slow smile. “Ooh, right. I guess that makes some sense, but—”
Before he could finish his excuse, he was forced to raise his hands to shield himself from the onslaught of five pens and an empty stapler that sailed his way.
“Ow! Stop that!”
I had let Caleb in on the secret about two weeks prior, around the time he started asking why I was routing all my work communications to Robert through his computer instead of my own. I briefly explained the one-night stand, downplaying it as much as was possible, and I even tried to decipher the confusion that followed regarding Robert, like the dessert incident in his office, as well as the landslide of little inconsistencies that soon followed.
Caleb was a rare gem, the best of both worlds, a pretty face but also a good listener. When I told him all about my drama, he didn’t interrupt once, and he never made a single judgment against me. Not once did he sigh or roll his eyes, as Madison was so good at doing. When I finished my sad tale, he simply offered a sympathetic smile, then pulled a bottle of whisky from his bottom drawer. Whether it was the whisky or his compassionate demeanor or, most likely, a little of both, we bonded quickly and became good friends, possibly even great friends.
Now, all that went up in smoke the second I decided to make him my new target.
“All this time the guy’s had an identical twin!” I exclaimed, narrowing my eyes and conjuring up disdain as I leaned across his desk, threateningly eyeing a tray of paperclips and thumbtacks, as if they might become my next arsenal. “How could you possibly keep that a secret, Caleb?”
He wisely slid his heavy paperweights out of reach before lifting his hands in surrender, wearing a deer-in-the-headlights expression. “What secret was there to tell you? I knew it couldn’t possibly be James, because he wasn’t in the country, not even on this side of the globe.”
“He apparently was.”
“Incognito then!” Caleb cried, sliding his rolling chair back a few inches as Madison casually fished a Taser out of her purse. “You can’t blame me for that!”
“You know,” Madison began tentatively, sheathing the Taser once more, “the guy does have a point, Della.”
“What?!” I spun around to face her in my chair. “How can you possibly take his side in this? I thought you and I were on the same page here. We both agreed it’s all Caleb’s fault.”
Rather than involving himself in the argument that he wanted no part of, Caleb sat quietly in his chair, stiff as a statue, with his wide eyes locked on something just above our heads. Finally, like a ventriloquist and without even moving his mouth, he muttered, “Uh, guys...”
“We did agree, and I thought we were right,” she said quickly. “I’m just saying the poor bloke does bring up a solid point about James supposedly not being in the country. It is not strange for the man to travel, so it didn’t even cross his mind to mention him.”
“Guys?”
“This is unbelievable.” I tossed back my hair, fuming at the very thought. “Maybe it’s some British quirk, but in the States, if you hook up with someone who later doesn’t remember it, and you know that person has an identical twin, you might consider bringing that up!”
“Really?” Madison countered, raising her voice as well. “Even if the twin was on the other side of the planet at the time of the tryst and hadn’t been seen in months?”
“For the last time, yes! Quit taking his side. Why is this even a—”
“Guys!”
“What is it, Caleb?” Madison and I yelled at the same time, turning to glare at the man seated on the other side of the desk.
“I think hell just froze over,” he said, staring out into the hall rather than looking at us.
We rotated slowly in our chairs as the elevator dinged and James Cross stepped out. Instantly, it was as if the entire office was caught in a spell, some sort of Twilight Zone-esque time loop. For a moment, no one dared to move, breathe, or even blink. People froze mid-step, mid-gesture, and even the printers seemed to pause in their perpetual rhythm.
Then, just as quickly as everything stopped, it all started moving again, triple-time, as if trying to make up for the brief delay. A hundred buzzing conversations whipped around at lightning speed as people rushed forward to greet him. The horde stumbled awkwardly through the required hospitality, shaking his hand with an overabundance of enthusiasm while trying not to openly stare at his face in awe. One or two even sank into a regrettable sort of bow before they were ushered away by their comrades, presumably off to a life of therapy and tears.
“What the hell is he doing here?” Madison whispered, still rooted firmly in her chair, her eyes widening a bit before flashing over to me. “Is he looking for you?”