I burst into tears.
He closed the door behind him and came to my side, lifting Olivia from my arms. “Go. Shower.”
“Well, hello to you, too,” I snapped, but I laughed through my tears, because this was all funny in a tragic comedy kind of way. Usually, when we saw each other, we were Emir and Chloe. Chloe never looked like this. She was always beautiful and wore sexy underwear.
I didn’t even have a bra on.
“Go on. You look exhausted,” he ordered. “I know how to care for a baby. Have a bath, and we’ll still be here when you’re finished.”
“Okay,” I agreed, wiping away my tears. “But, if I’m not back in an hour, come check on me. Make sure I didn’t fall asleep and drown.”
Olivia reached for me, and El-Mudad lifted her up, clucking his tongue and giving her a goofy smile before he zerberted her tummy through her stained onesie. That was all it took to win her over. She giggled with delight and slapped both her hands on either side of his face, and I used the distraction to slip away.
I was totally cool leaving her to be traumatized by abandonment to a stranger. What kind of mother figure did that make me?
One who hadn’t had a spare moment since the nanny had gone on family leave. The shower was waiting, promising me a quick, easy solution to my serious bodily hygiene problem, but my tub.
My beautiful bathtub.
Sometimes, when people talk about lifelong love, they sound like they’re me talking about my bathtub. It’s a gorgeous copper claw-foot with a white porcelain interior that curves over the rim. The bottom is a little scuffed, owing to the fact that it’s an antique, but it just makes me love it more. When I get in it, I feel like Cinderella in the pumpkin coach on the way to the ball.
El-Mudad was a wonderful man, and he wouldn’t begrudge me a little bit of luxury.
I turned on the taps, sinking down as the tub filled.
How had El-Mudad shown up at exactly the perfect time? Guiltily, I realized that I hadn’t let him know what was going on with Neil. So, why had he just shown up?
Maybe he’d come hoping to contact Neil. It would make sense; as far as I knew, Neil had mostly cut himself off from everyone after Emma’s death. El-Mudad had sent a lovely flower arrangement to the funeral, but he hadn’t attended. I’d sent him a thank you card, but apart from that, we hadn’t talked, at all.
I loved my tub, and it pained me to do it, but I turned off the taps and popped the plug, opting for a shower instead. I washed up as fast as I could—which wasn’t very fast, considering the layers of filth that had accumulated on me—and dressed in some fresh clothes. I braided my hair, not bothering to blow dry it, and went back to the kitchen.
A hot guy being cute with a baby was the most incredibly sexy thing to me, even though I’d never wanted kids. There was just something satisfying in seeing a guy who should, by societal standards, strive for hyper-masculinity in all things, doing something traditionally feminine.
And there wasn’t much that said “traditionally feminine” more than feeding a sleepy baby. El-Mudad had taken o
ff his jacket, and he sat in one of the kitchen chairs, holding Olivia in the crook of his arm. His t-shirt must have been tailored or something, because it fit him the way Chris Evans’s t-shirts fit in the Marvel movies. I swore the sleeves were straining, while the faded burgundy cotton clung to his near-concave abs.
Olivia gazed up at him, her fat little hands clasped around his as he fed her the bottle. When I fed her, she held her own bottle. She didn’t need his help, she was just flirting with him.
When she was old enough to process abstract thought, we were going to have a serious conversation about pretending to be helpless to get a guy’s attention.
“That was faster than I expected,” he said with a chuckle. “I thought you would be hiding in there for at least twenty-four hours.”
“Nah.” I went to the coffee pot, glancing at the stove. “You made the mac and cheese?”
“Yes. Somehow, by the grace of God, I was able to complete this task, though the struggle was mighty.”
“Okay, smart ass. I’m sorry, I’m just impressed that you and Neil know how to do anything.” I filled the coffee pot with water as I talked. “If I had that kind of money, I would never do anything.”
“But you do have that kind of money. And there you are, making coffee.” he reminded me.
“And mac and cheese,” I admitted guiltily. “I don’t know, I thought maybe because I grew up in a different lifestyle than the two of you…but, you know, it is a little weird having someone taking care of Olivia, instead of us, all the time. It’s nice, but it’s a little weird.”
“Having live-in staff is intrusive,” El-Mudad agreed. “Is that why you don’t have a nanny?”
“Oh, we do.” I paused to grind the coffee beans. As I dumped them into the filter, I added, “She’s just out of town for a family thing.”
“And you’re somehow able to survive?” he teased. “Having money is just having money, but you know how inconvenient it can be. If you want a snack at two in the morning, do you call someone and wait for them to make it, or is it easier just to go to the kitchen yourself?”