He caught her hand and raised it to his lips. “Would you come to me tonight?”
Consent rose to her lips, but wouldn’t emerge. She’d been a housemaid mere weeks, but it had shocked her how intimately the staff observed the family’s habits. “If I come to your bed at Alloway Chase, everyone will know.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t want the other servants to call me a slut.”
The word hung between them, harsh, ugly, and sadly true. “I’ll never think of you like that.”
She searched his face, wanting reassurance. “Your mother deserves my respect. I can’t do it.”
“I want you so much.”
Something in his tone made her frown. “You’re testing me.”
Self-derision edged his smile. “I suppose I am. This morning, I struggled to resign myself to never having you. Now all my dreams come true. You can’t blame a man for questioning such a miracle.”
She smiled back. Something about his vulnerability made her heart squeeze in a painful ecstasy of love. She swallowed and struggled to make sensible decisions. “You don’t want a scandal.”
How odd to think that before she came to Alloway Chase, deceit had been completely foreign to her. Since then, every day she’d told lie after lie, and now she signed up for a lifetime of subterfuge.
“Right now, I don’t care.”
“But you will,” she said flatly. She stiffened her spine and told herself to be brave. If she wanted the marquess, she must pay the price.
“So I must resign myself to more lonely nights?” The question was wry, but she heard his frustration.
“Oh, Leath…”
He hauled her up for another ardent kiss. But she’d reached a point where kisses no longer satisfied. Even in her inexperience, she knew that for both of them, only consummation could allay their raging desire. Still, she gave herself up to him with a fierceness that left them both panting.
One powerful hand curled around her buttock. The other cupped her face. The mixture of overt demand and sweet care threatened her resolve and she muffled a sob. “I thought once I said yes, this would be easy.”
The strengthening wind whipped her damp skirts around her legs. The storm around her paled in comparison to the storm in her soul.
“Nothing worthwhile is easy,” he said with a hint of grimness.
“I won’t change my mind,” she said firmly.
Such relief flooded his face that for the first time, she realized quite how much he wanted her. Her gloominess about the future retreated.
“Thank God,” he breathed and kissed her quickly, withdrawing before passion ignited. His features were tight with control, hinting at the restraint he exercised here where he could lift her skirts in seconds.
She moved closer and rested against him. His arms encircled her, surrounding her with his familiar scent, tinged with lingering traces of river water. “I have to trust you not to expose us to the world’s censure.”
His embrace tightened. “I’ll do my best, Eleanor. With sleepless nights ahead, I’ll have plenty of thinking time.”
“I’d rather be lying beside you.”
“Believe me, I’ll do my best to find a quick solution.”
A fat drop of rain hit her head. She looked up and another landed on her cheek. The wind tore the last leaves from the trees around them.
“It’s been a watery day.” She struggled to make their separation bearable. After this, seeing him without touching him would be torture.
He laughed softly. “It’s been a marvelous day. I look forward to an even more marvelous day.”
“Don’t make me wait long,” she said softly, as freezing rain swirled around them.