‘As ever,’ I say.
‘Thanks.’
‘I think I had a hand in it too!’
‘More than a hand.’ He smiles and looks back at Sasha. ‘So was that OK?’
‘Oh, don’t ask me,’ she says with a self-conscious giggle. ‘I think that’s between the two of you. But the camera loved it.’
‘That’s great,’ he says.
‘Do you want to go through to the shower? I’ll put the kettle on.’ She scuttles off to the sink, turning her back on us.
Lloyd rears up and pulls out of me. He runs a hand through his hair, shutting his eyes for a moment, re-orientating. ‘Shower, then.’ He picks up his clothes, frowns at the terrible state of his jacket and gives me an encouraging nod. ‘Oh dear,’ he says, clicking his tongue. ‘Can’t you stand? Poor afflicted thing.’
‘Shut up. Of course I can stand.’ I swing my legs over the side and give a fair impression of Bambi’s first few upright seconds. Lloyd swoops forwards and helps me. ‘So gallant, proper Sir Walter Raleigh, aren’t you?’
From the kitchen corner, Sasha snorts. ‘Are you two always like this?’ she asks, without turning around.
I pick up my neatly folded clothes and hug them to my chest. ‘Always.’
In the shower, Lloyd directs the water over my breasts and my sticky thighs.
‘You didn’t fail then,’ he says, sounding disappointed.
‘Did you think I would?’
‘I need to up my game.’
The jets spray on to my breasts, tingling my nipples. Lloyd cups the underside of my breasts, holding them in place while he keeps the shower head no more than an inch above them.
‘What’s next?’ I ask, flexing my toes, splashing them in the lovely warm water. ‘Sex while parachuting from a plane? In a canoe going over a waterfall? In space?’
He puts the shower head back in its cradle, takes the bottle of gel cleanser, squirts it into his hand, lathers it up around my breasts and stomach and shoulders.
‘Yeah,’ he says, with an enigmatic look. ‘You keep thinking along those lines, Soph.’
‘What do you mean?’
He smothers me with bubbling foam and pulls me against him so our chests slip and slide together. Water rains into our mouths while we kiss, leaking into the cracks of lips, dripping off our noses, clogging up our eyelashes.
He turns me around and washes my back and bottom, very thoroughly, far more thoroughly than is quite necessary.
‘I mean what I mean,’ he says, letting the suds slip down the crack of my arse, parting the cheeks, massaging the slightly stinging soap inside.
‘As Confucius would say. What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘It’s supposed to mean what it’s supposed to mean.’
I try to slap him, but it isn’t easy when you’re facing the wrong way and he has his hands on your bum. I manage an awkward collision of elbow (mine) and hip (his) and reap my inevitable reward.
‘Ouch!’ I always forget that a smack on a wet bottom is worth about three on a dry one.
‘Impatient,’ he reproves, keeping me close and tight with an arm around my ribs. Something semi-hard pushes into my right buttock, distracting me from the newly laid sting. ‘All will be revealed in time.’
I lean my head back on his shoulder, looking up while he looks down.
‘You know, I really hate you, Lloyd.’