She had kept one of my hands between hers and still hadn’t let go. “I’m too happy to be mad though. I thought I’d never see you again. You just disappeared into thin air.”
“I’m truly sorry,” I said. “At the time, it seemed like the only option I had.”
She cocked her head to one side. “You haven’t changed much.”
“Neither have you. Tell me everything,” I said. “Are you married?”
A glint came into her eyes. “About to.” She raised her left hand to reveal a gorgeous engagement ring, sparkling with diamonds. “We found each other in time. I’m getting married in two weeks.”
“Oh wow!” I said. “Congratulations! That’s so pretty. What’s his name?”
“Ben Fox. He’s great and I can’t wait for you to meet him,” she said.
Silence enveloped us as we stared at each other. The elephant between us grew bigger until Amy spoke.
“What happened Charlotte? Why did you run away? What were you running away from?”
A lump formed in my throat and I couldn’t speak. I’d never thought of what I’d done as running away but that’s what it had been. I’d been running away from my future life, not wanting to burden Alex or my friends with my problem. But they had found me now.
I had managed to fool Alex with hints that my ‘boyfriend’ had broken my heart but that wouldn’t work with Amy. She knew me too well and would see through the bullshit.
I swallowed hard. “I don’t know where to start.”
“Start at the beginning,” she said, in a voice that lacked judgement, only love.
“Okay,” I said and started by telling her about my first visit to the eye doctor and the devastating results that I got.
“Oh no that’s terrible,” Amy said. “You haven’t lost all your vision though?”
I shook my head and shivered. “Not yet. There hasn’t been any change for months. I’m praying it stays that way.”
“I didn’t want to be a burden to Alex after everything he had sacrificed for me. Also I didn’t want that he would have to take care of a disabled wife when he was so young” My voice was cracking.
Amy waited for me to regain my composure.
“So I run and wrote letters to all of you.”
“I knew it!” Amy said. “I knew that story was bullshit as soon as Alex told me. But Charlotte, why would you think you’d be a burden. Illness is not a choice.”
I bowed my head. How could I explain it in a way she would understand?
“Ah, I think I’m beginning to see where this is going,” Amy said quietly. “You thought it was a punishment because of his family.”
I fought to keep my tears inside my eyes but lost the battle and they dropped down my cheeks. I nodded.
“That’s just like you Char to blame yourself for things which are out of your control. I’m so sorry I didn’t look for you.”
I laughed amid my tears. “You can’t blame yourself for something like that. I didn’t want to be found. I needed a new life from everyone I knew,” I said. “Now that I think about it, my thinking might have been slightly flawed.”
“Your thinking was fucked up,” Amy said in her blunt way.
I was glad that she hadn’t changed as her honesty was one of the traits that I loved and appreciated about her. Amy simply didn’t know how to sugar coat.
Her features softened. “Alex told me that you have a little boy.”
“Yeah.” I fidgeted in my seat. “His name is Kayden and he’s one year and three months old.” I waited for the pin to drop.
When it did, Amy’s eyes grew so big, I thought they would fall off.
“Oh my God!” she said. “Kayden is Alex’s son.”
I nodded. “Correct.”
She narrowed her eyes and leaned forward on the table. “He doesn’t know, does he?”
“No.” Saying it aloud felt so wrong.
“Oh Char, you can’t do that,” Amy said. “He deserves to know.”
“I know he does. I tried calling but he’d changed numbers. Then I called his mom and left a message with her that Alex should call me urgently. He didn’t.”
“Did it occur to you that she might not have passed on the message?”
“Now it has but then it did not,” I said.
We were both silent again.
“What about now?” she asked.
“I’ll will tell him but not just yet. I have to know that I can trust his family. What if they take Kayden away from me? They’re lawyers, they could attempt to prove that I’m an unfit mother because of my medical issues, especially if they worsen” I said.
“Oh Char,” Amy said and covered my hand with hers, and I knew she understood.
“Do you want to meet Kayden? How long are you in town for?”
She laughed. “Of course, I would. I’m going back tomorrow. How big is your house? I’ve not booked a B&B?”
“Big enough. I have a spare bedroom.” Excitement coursed through me as we left the diner hand in hand. I was so happy, I wanted to cry.