“I never ever will let anything happen to you, Willow. Ever.” His hand comes up and he trails his finger over my face. “Ever.”
“I know you won’t,” I tell him, my heart beating so fast in my chest. Not sure if he is going to turn me away or not. I can’t not take the chance with him. “I know you aren’t my first kiss.” My finger traces his lips. “But I want you to be my first with everything else.”
“Willow,” he says my name, and I have to wonder if he even wants me. I’m about to take a step back. “Now I don’t know what you just thought, but I can tell you that it’s probably bullshit.” He looks at me. “What did you just think?”
“I, um …” I try to think of something to say.
“Also, you should know that I know when you’re lying,” he says, and I roll my eyes. “Your eyes turn a touch darker when you are lying.” I stand in front of him shocked he would know this. “And when you’re nervous, you tap your finger over and over again. I’ve watched you for the past two months,” he says. “I’ve watched you build yourself up again. I’ve watched you work every single day to better yourself. I’ve watched you fight the demons away. I’ve watched you silently want things but never ask for it. I’ve watched you every single day.”
“Quinn,” I say his name because I don’t even know what to say. “I haven’t shown anyone the real me, because I don’t know who the real me is. But here. With you. It’s as real as it gets.”
“With you,” he says, shaking his head. “The only place in the world I want to be is with you.”
I smile up at him, dropping the stuffed dog on the floor and taking his hand in mine. I pull him past the bedroom I sleep in, past the living room, and to the one door I’ve never stepped inside. “I’ve thought about what your bedroom looks like,” I admit to him. “I wondered if you lie in bed thinking of me.” My hand goes out to his chest.
“I haven’t slept in the bed since we came home from the hospital,” he admits to me. “I was too afraid I wouldn’t hear you if you needed me.” He pushes the hair behind my ear. “So I stayed on the couch.”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. I could have been lying in a pool of blood, bleeding out and my mother would have walked over my body, and this man who owes me nothing wants to give me everything. “Show me your bed, Quinn,” I say and he bends down to kiss me and picks me up in his arms.
“This is not how I saw this happening,” he says as he walks into his bedroom, and I take it in for the first time. The soft light on from the two lamps on his wooden bedside tables.
His room is massive with the big king-size bed in the middle of the room. The ceiling on top of the bed has pieces of wood on it, leading to a fan. “I wanted to make you dinner and get candles.” He walks over to the bed, and I swear it looks even more comfortable than the bed I sleep in, and that bed is a cloud.
He puts me on the bed, and I sink right in. I open my legs, and he stands between them, pushing my hair from my face. “I am going to cherish every single part of your body,” he says, and all I can do is watch the way his lips move. He bends, and I tilt my head back as he kisses my lips.
I look up at him. “Show me,” I say, taking my shirt and pulling it over my head.
I lie back on his bed, hoping he comes on the bed with me. I watch his hand clench into a fist, the agony all over his face. “Willow, you have no idea what you do to me.”
I lift my hips, slipping the shorts over my hips and tossing them aside. “What do I do to you?” I ask, and he throws his head back to look up at the ceiling.
“I’m afraid to hurt you,” he admits. “I’m afraid I’m going to push you too hard.”
“You won’t hurt me.” I sit up and reach out for one of his hands. I bring his hand to my lips. “These hands will never hurt me.” I kiss his hand. “Piece by piece.” I look up at him. “You put me back together again.”
His hand comes up and cups my cheek. “You are so beautiful,” he says and pushes me back. His body comes over mine, and I can’t believe how lucky I am. His mouth claims mine, and this time, the kiss is all tongue. His tongue fights with mine, and I moan when his fingers trail from my chin to my chest. He stops kissing me, our eyes watching his hand, and he stops at the swell of my breast. “Beautiful isn’t even a good enough word for you.” He slips his hand into the bra, and my nipple waits for his touch. He pushes down the cup of my bra, and his mouth takes my nipple, and if he wasn’t on top of me, I would have jumped up. I feel it all the way to my stomach, and my legs wrap around his hips. He moves to the other nipple, and my head goes back as I take in all the emotions running through me.