Hell, yes, she was.
But I still had my pride, and she’d stomped on it pretty bad.
She always had a shield that pushed people away, made her look distant, like she didn’t give a damn. But she did care.
I had a bad habit of losing my keys, never remembering where I put them. But Red had placed a pretty bowl beside the umbrella stand in the living room, and she’d put them there for me. I felt how much she cared every time I saw those keys in the bowl.
I felt it when I woke up in the morning and walked into the kitchen and saw her cooking pancakes. I felt it when she looked at me like she couldn’t figure out what to do with me. Her eyes would be confused and wary at first, and then they’d clear up and grow warm, as if she was telling herself it was okay to be happy. She’d smile at me sweetly, and I’d feel a squeeze in my heart.
Then go back and fix it, Cameron had said.
* * *
The next thing I knew, my alarm was going off. I didn’t want to get up—I’d hardly slept a wink—but Red might be at school. Maybe I could…start fixing it.
I borrowed some of Cameron’s clothes and drove us both to school.
The guys were talking and laughing as we joined them, but I couldn’t tune in. We were walking in the hallways, and my eyes couldn’t help scanning the crowd for her.
She wasn’t there.
“You look like shit, dude,” Justin commented.
I narrowed my eyes at him. I shrugged—and then froze. I would have missed her if I hadn’t looked up at that exact moment. Red looked like she was in a hurry as she entered the washroom.
Did she see me? Was she hurrying because she didn’t want me to see her?
I walked past the washrooms, my heart pounding. If she wanted to hide from me, that could only mean there was no chance of her listening to what I had to say. I kept walking with the guys, lost in thought. The look on her face pulled at me. She’d looked sad and tired, like she’d had trouble sleeping last night. Was it because she was thinking of me? It had to be.
“So, Caleb, tell me: Was it pussy?” Justin asked. “You’re not getting it enough from your old lady? If you were, you’d look a hell of a lot more relaxed than—”
I shoved him, wanting to smash his face in. “Don’t you fucking talk about her like that!”
“Hey!” Cameron held me back. My shoulders were tense, my body ready for a fight.
Amos glared at Justin. “That was a dick move, bro.”
“I was just fooling around, dude. Chill.” Justin held up his hands. “Sorry. Won’t happen again.”
I ignored him and turned to Cameron. “I’ll catch up with you later.”
He nodded.
I walked back to the washroom and leaned against the wall like a creep, waiting for her.
* * *
Veronica
Clad in her fluffy white bathrobe, Kara prepared a sandwich for me, taking the opportunity to explain a few things. “Loyal men are like unicorns. You’ve heard of them, seen them in movies, read about them in fairy tales, but I’d have a better chance of shitting one than finding one in real life,” Kara declared, closing the ziplock bag
containing the sandwich. “Here ya go, luv. Eat this. I only cook for people I love. Don’t waste my love because it don’t come cheap.” She sang the last part.
She hadn’t cooked anything. It was a peanut butter sandwich, which she knew was my favorite. I love Kar.
She leaned against the kitchen island as she sipped her coffee, studying me. “Why don’t you stay in today? You and I didn’t get any sleep last night.” She choked on her coffee. “Boy, that came out wrong.”
Laughing, I grabbed the sandwich and placed it in my bag. I shook my head and slung my backpack over my shoulder. “I can’t, Kar. It’s…it’s just better this way. I need to stay busy.”