God.
My arms wrapped around him as I buried my face against his chest, sobbing. I was soaking his shirt, but I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing.
I didn’t know how long we stayed like that, but eventually my sobs diminished to just hiccupping. Caleb was still rubbing my back, softly humming a song. I closed my eyes, letting his voice soothe me.
“Want to talk about it?” he asked quietly.
I shook my head. I felt him nod, and then he kissed my hair. The memory of the nightmare was already escaping me, like dust in the wind. I reached for it, concentrating hard to catch it, but then it was gone.
“Caleb?”
“Mmm-hmm?”
“Will you stay with me tonight? Please.”
His intake of breath was audible. “Yes,” he said simply, pulling me closer so the top of my head was secured under his chin.
Just like that. No questions asked.
Had anyone besides my mom cared for me this much?
No, not like this. Never before Caleb.
“I almost broke your door when I heard you screaming. I hope you don’t mind that I opened it. I have a key.”
I shook my head and burrowed deeper against him.
I noticed the soft patter of rain blowing against the windows. It consoled me, steadied me. I’ve always loved the sound, even when I was a child.
“Do you like the rain?” he asked softly.
I snuggled closer to him, held him tighter. “Yes.”
“Tell me why you like it,” he whispered.
“Do you like it, Caleb?”
I felt him smile. He probably thought I was avoiding his question, but truthfully, I wanted to hear his answer.
“Yes, I do. When I was young, I would run outside every time it rained so I could play. I loved the smell of it, loved the way it hit my skin. It tasted like the ocean.”
Thunder rumbled outside, the sound booming through the room. Thunder didn’t scare me. I loved it. Caleb didn’t seem to mind it either because he let out a contented sigh.
“To me, it symbolizes new beginnings. I don’t know if you believe in God or in a higher being, but I do. I was an altar boy growing up, you know.” He chuckled. “That white robe was my Sunday attire for years.”
I smiled. “You said the rain symbolizes new beginnings to you.”
“Yes,” he answered after a moment. He seemed lost in his thoughts as he absently stroked my arm.
I closed my eyes. His touch felt so good.
“I feel like God is washing off the dirt from the world,” he explained. “Wiping the slate clean. Handing you a new beginning. Washing away all the sadness, the sorrow, the nightmares.”
I didn’t know why I felt sad all of a sudden. “Some bad things can’t be washed away, Caleb.”
“See now, that’s just sad. True enough, there are some bad things that are just part of your landscape, and you can’t simply wash them away. But you can learn to accept them and not let them define who you are,” he continued, his voice turning deeper. He tipped his head back so he could look into my eyes.
“It’s what you learn from the bad things that can determine the path you choose. If you embrace your scars and let them make you stronger, you might be able