I stayed close to the door, listening to the sounds outside the bedroom. I heard the soft voice of an older woman, followed by Caleb’s deeper tones. Twenty minutes later, there was a gentle rap on the door.
Cautious, I stayed where I was and waited. The door slowly opened an inch. “Red?”
I stood right behind the door, still out of view. “I’m here,” I said.
“I have to go. So…I’ll see you tonight?”
We stood on either side of the door, whispering like kids sharing secrets.
“Sure,” I answered.
“Are you going to miss me?”
I paused. “Sure, Caleb.”
He cleared his throat. “Later, Red,” he said softly as he closed the door.
“Later, Caleb,” I whispered to no one.
Chapter Four
Veronica
I spent the rest of my morning at the school library, using their computer to apply for jobs online, print my résumé, and make a list of businesses that were hiring.
Armed with a stack of résumés, I went to every business on my list. When that didn’t yield anything promising, I felt desperate enough to submit my résumé to everyone else.
It had been four hours of nonstop walking, filling out forms, and repeatedly hearing “I’m sorry, we’re not hiring” and “We’ll give you a call.” I was exhausted, discouraged, and starving.
The pancakes I’d had for breakfast had been digested long ago. I knew I should eat something, but I didn’t want to waste the money I had left on food. I could wait until I got back to Caleb’s apartment to eat.
I let out a sigh, almost tripping when the sole of my shoe started to fall off.
Overwhelmed, I stared at the gaping space between the upper and now-separating sole of my sneaker. My throat felt thick, and I had an intense urge to scream at the joke that was my life.
It would be laughable if an old, worn-out shoe was the last straw that finally broke me.
When Mom was alive, we barely scraped by with our two incomes. When her condition got worse and she had to quit her job, I had to take out a credit line on top of my school loans to keep a roof over our heads.
Eventually, she had to stay in the hospital, and I rented a bed space in a house with five other people to save money. Safe was a foreign concept in that house. I started carrying a pocketknife and kept my valuables in my school locker. When Mom passed away, I saved as much as I could and left the small town where we’d lived for over ten years. I had been commuting into Esther Falls for both my jobs, so moving there made sense. I rented an apartment close to the university, where I was completing a two-year program in culinary arts.
The studio apartment was as small as a postage stamp, the furniture old and secondhand, and the surrounding neighborhood was rough. But it was mine.
I had worked hard to pay for everything in it. I had privacy. I didn’t need to share the bathroom with anyone, didn’t need to clean up someone else’s mess, didn’t need to worry every night that someone would steal my things or…something worse.
All that was gone now.
Due to bankruptcy, the dance studio where I’d worked since high school had closed down without warning, leaving me broke. I also had a part-time job as a server at a small restaurant, but there was no way my hours there could cover my bills, and I fell behind. When my landlord kicked me out for failing to pay two months of rent, something inside me broke.
Then I met Caleb, and here I was.
When things became too rough to handle, Mom always said something to cheer us both up. I remembered the feel of her weak hands squeezing mine as she wasted away in that hospital bed. “Everything that happens in your life is to prepare you, Veronica,” she’d said. “Metal has to go through fire to melt and be turned into a sword. Be strong because this is just a test. You are being melted, being molded into a stronger person. This burning will pass, and you will find rest. Don’t give up, honey.”
Closing my eyes and taking deep breaths, I composed myself. Life had taught me that it didn’t wait for anyone. I had to move on. When I opened my eyes, I was ready to tackle the rest of the day, broken shoe be damned.
* * *
It was late when I arrived at Caleb’s apartment. I was exhausted, but I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my face. I might not have gotten a job offer, but I’d gotten my résumé into as many hands as possible. It had been a very productive day.